Here comes the sun
by The One That Got Away TCW
Summary: Emily thinks Aiden's dead. But is he really? What if he survived with someone's help? Who is that someone? Will Aimily continue to be the perfect couple? Will there be any obstacles? Aimily fanfiction set in chapter 3x22
1. Chapter 1

**Hi! So I know Aiden died and some fans might be fine with that buy I'm not and this fan fiction is going to be all about Aimily and their love story. It's also going to have a bit of mysterious things now and then and it's during the six months through season 3 and 4. David will be popping out so don't worry. I know everyone says this but please review and tell me how you're liking it because it's motivation. With that said you can go ahead and read. I hope you like it, remember to comment! **

"I loved him, more than I've ever loved anyone." I say. I just cant believe he's gone, I dont want to believe it."I know Ems but you're just not listening" Nolan says as he takes a step forward. He got here like ten minutes ago after calling me all night and getting no response as an answer. I just can't stop crying and I hate it. I hate being so weak, I hate being vulnerable. It's just so unfair, everything me and Aiden had worked for is falling into place but he's no longer here to and see that. He dedicated the last years of his life to me, and I betrayed him. He's dead and it's on me because of my stupid revenge. It's my fault, it's all my fault.

"I'm to blame" I whisper. Nolan growls and I continue "I'm to blame," I repeat higher this time and he steps closer trying to reach me "it's my fault he's dead!" I start hitting him trying to get him away from me. I don't want comfort, I just wanna be alone and cry the life out of me. But he keeps reaching out for me and tries to make me stop "I pulled him back Nolan! He was gone and he was hap-"

"He is happy!" Nolan shouts over me cutting me off "He is happy Ems and he'll keep being happy because he's not dead!"

That shuts me up. Is he trying to make me feel better? Because pretending he's alive will only make me go crazy and nuts and that does not help. "What do you mean with that?" I ask now softer.

"Emily, I've been calling you all night and day. Yesterday at midnight I got a call from the hospital, they took his body for the autopsy and they found a pulse...he, he's not dead!" He smiles at me "He's alive Ems. 007 never dies".

What? What's he talking about? He's definitely not lying because I know Nolan, and he wouldn't play around like this. Why didn't he tell me before? When did this happen? I can't believe it. I found him dead, he was cold as ice and there's no pulse, at least that's what I thought. Is this even possible? I have so many questions in my head but only one comes out "Can I see him?"

Nolan hesitates at first but he knows better than denying me something and so he answers "Ladies first" and motions me to take the lead.

* * *

**"Tetrodotoxin, frequently** abbreviated as **TTX**, is a potent neurotoxin. Its name derives from Tetraodontiformes, an order that includes several species that carry the toxin. Although tetrodotoxin was discovered in this fish and found in several other animals, it is actually produced by certain symbiotic bacteria, such as _Pseudoalteromonas tetraodonis. _Tetrodotoxin inhibits the firing of action potentials in nerves by binding to the voltage-gated sodium channels in nerve cell membranes and blocking the passage of sodium ions into the nerve cell." The doctors explains.

What the hell did he just say? I cached some ideas here and there but this medical talking is just not for me. I look up at Nolan and I you can clearly see the same confusion in his face.

"Let me explain it easier. Tetrodotoxin, also known as the poison in pufferfish, lowers your pulse and body temperature, while also creating a kind of artificial coma, so unless its screened for, this can be mistaken for death, we believe this is the reason everyone thought he was dead. But if taken in larger quantities it can cause the paralysis of the diaphragm causing suffocation, which was starting to happen by the time he got here." He looks both of us and continues "TTX is extremely toxic. The toxin can enter the body by ingestion, injection, inhalation and through abraded skin. The detectives will be asking you about that latter so don't worry I won't ask questions. The victim, although completely paralyzed, may be conscious and in some cases completely lucid until shortly before death. Death usually occurs within 4 to 6 hours, with a known range of about 20 minutes to 8 hours. After running some tests and analyzing we suspect that Aiden got here after the 6 hours but before 8 hours." He takes a breath and says "He was nearly dying when the doctors found him alive so we had to go in surgery immediately since the toxin had already spread around his body. I'm sorry to inform you that in order to continue with a successful recovery we had to induce him in a coma and we'll just have to wait and see how he does. I'm genuinely sorry Ms. Thorne"

I start feeling dizzy from all he just said. Victoria poisoned him with a toxin that takes 4 to 6 hours to kill the victim? Why? I mean there are other drugs that can kill you quicker. This whole thing sounds so...strange. And then again the man I love was nearly dying a few hours ago and he's in a coma now. He's in a coma, a fucking coma and it's my fault! I can't keep listening to doctors telling me where to go or what's going on. I need to see him, I need to touch him, I need to know he's okay.

I start backing away as I feel it all hit me. I try to steady myself with one hand on the wall as I speak "I, I, I have to, I need to-"

"It's okay, it's alright Ems" Nolan says taking my side. "Thank you doctor for the update, I'm going to take her to see him now" he smiles politely and starts helping me turn.

I let him help me only because I'm too weak right now and he leads us towards Aiden. We through a few hallways and I try to avoid everything around me but it's impossible. Every four rooms you can hear people crying, probably mourning over their sick family member or friend. It's not that I don't like hospitals, I hate them. Never once have I been happy inside one and I'll never be.

"Right here" I hear Nolan saying as I come out of my daydreaming or nightmaring (nice word).

We step inside and I freeze. "Aiden" I whisper. He looks just like last night...dead. The only thing that keeps my thoughts from believing his gone is the machine that shows his heartbeat. He's heart is beating, he's heart is beating, it is beating. My legs start moving by themselves and my mind is still gone. I sit beside him and sigh. I'm not sure what to do so I look at Nolan looking for support.

"It's okay Ems, he's gonna be okay" he smiles sweetly encouraging me to show any emotion "Imma be outside"

He starts leaving but my voice stops him "Nolan".

"I'll be right outside. I'm not going anywhere" he reassures me and leaves.

He knows what I need, he always does. I have to be with him, alone. I'm trying hard to look at Aiden again, but it's like my body won't let me. I take a deep breath just like Takeda taught me to during our breathing exercises. In and out...in and out. Okay I can do this. I slowly turn my head so I'm looking directly at him. I take my time getting use to seeing him like this, my Aiden. He didn't deserve this. Victoria should have poisoned me instead, but she was playing by the rules, I destroyed her loved ones so she kills mine. I take his hand slowly as if scared he'll pull away from me. I wish he could, I think, at least that would mean he's awake. His hand is rough and cold. This is too much, I tell myself as a few tears start to fall from my eyes.

"I'm sorry" my voice comes out weaker than I intended. I clear my throat and continue "I'm so sorry Aiden."

In a fairytale, this is the part when prince charming would wake up, look at his dear princess and kiss her. But this is not a fairytale, and he won't wake up. I won't be looked by those deep ocean eyes and I won't be kissed, at least not today. What am I gonna do? What am I gonna do without him? He's always there for me, I think he knows me better than I know myself, I need him. I, I-

"I love you" I say out loud "I love you Aiden and I'm sorry it took me so long to catch up." I squeeze his hand and bring it to my lips.

A sob scapes my mouth as I carefully place his hand down. And then I see it, I don't know how I didn't notice it before. His engagement ring is gone. What? Why? He never took it off, at least not when we were together.

"I'm back." Nolan says entering the room as he hands me a coffee "Here you go"

I quickly clean the tears away with my shirt, which I now realize I haven't changed since yesterday, and then I grab it. "Nolan? Has anyone given you Aiden's belongings yet?"

"Oh yes!" He answers turning around. He opens the little closet in the room and takes out a big plastic bag with clothes and other things in it. "This is everything he was carrying with him."

I open it and take out the clothes first. This brings me to many bad memories from last night, how I held him crying and shouting till I could no more. I now wonder if he was conscious then, maybe he listened to me and wanted to stop me but couldn't.

"Burn it" I say. Nolan starts shaking his head and is about to talk but I stop him "Nolan please burn it!"

"Fine" he takes all the clothes. "What are you looking for anyways?" he asks.

"His ring." I answer as I search the bag as if my life depended on it. "I-I can't find it! It's not here!" I growl.

"Emily calm down. When was the last time you saw it?" He starts searching through the bag as well.

"The last time I saw him! When we agreed he would take care of..." I trail off because the guilt in saying that is way too much.

"Ems," he makes me look at him "go home and rest. See if you can find it there then go to bed, okay? You can come later. Don't you worry, I'll be here the whole time. I won't let anything happen to him. Remember 007 is my friend too" he smiles sweetly.

"Okay," I answer and start gathering my stuff "thanks. Take care of him, see you soon." I take one last look at Aiden and leave the room. He surely wasn't expecting that but I need to do something and I'm not going to wait any more time. I'm not really gonna go rest, I'm going to do what I do best. What's that? Oh well, seek revenge.

* * *

Next day Emily/Amanda's POV

I enter the room to find it much brighter than yesterday. Apparently Nolan bought a 'get well soon' balloon and a teddy bear for Aiden.

"I know Bond's very masculine, but I'm not so why not waste my money on girly gifts, right?" Nolan says.

"Good morning to you too." I answer. "I'm sorry I was gone all night"

"Oh don't worry, you deserved sometime for yourself" He brushes it off. "Did you find the ring?"

I look at Aiden for the first time today and wince. I'm so sorry, I say in my mind. "I, I don't know."

"Well what do you mean?" He asks confused because he knows me too well and he knows I'd have looked for it.

"I'm sorry Nolan, I didn't go home yesterday." I sigh. I can't lie to him "I took care of Victoria."

"Oh my god Emily! You killed Victoria?" He stands up "I know she's done way too many things but kill-"

"I didn't kill her!" I cut him off "I locked that bitch in the same mental health facility she locked my mother. She won't be out of there in a long time so" tears threat to fall from my eyes "it's-it's over. She's gone, Nolan she's gone." I smile as a tear spills down my face.

"Bitchtoria lost the war" he laughs as he takes a step towards me and hugs me.

I hug back "If only my dad could be here".

He quizzes me and says "He's watching us. He can now rest in peace".

We break the embrace and I continue "I told Aiden that when this was all over we'd be together." I change my gaze towards his bed "I'm not even sure I'll be able to keep my promise"

"Listen to me Ems. He's going to fight through this, for us," he says with a weak voice "for you".

"Thanks, for everything" I turn to look at him in the eyes "Aiden's the love of my life but you're my person".

He grins widely and hugs me tight "You're my person too."

After a few seconds of enjoying this happy little moment in my life, I have to speak up "Nolan. I. Can't. Breath."

"Oh!" He says as he lets go "Sorry for that"

I laugh a little and take a deep breath.

A sound comes from the door and it opens. Dr. Hunt walks in the room with what I assume is Aiden's chart.

"So" he starts "I've got good and bad news. It's your pick"

I know he's trying to lighten up the mood, but whatever he does bad news are still gonna be there, so he better cut the crap.

"Bad" I answer sharply.

"Well uhm, he's body is still intoxicated with tetrodotoxin but let's say that one part of his body got it the worst. His left leg is extremely contaminated and he's best chance right now is, uhm, surgery. He's leg is way too infected."

"He's best chance at what doctor?" Nolan asks the same thing I was thinking.

"Well cases like this don't always have to happen because of an open wound" he explains.

"Cases like this?" Nolan asks again while I remain silent.

"Aiden's leg, we need to operate or he could lose it" he answers and then clears his throat. He waits for something but not even Nolan speaks this time. So he continues "Good news are that he's doing better than we expected him to."

That takes me out of my daze "Better?" I laugh ironically "You think that is better? You think that" I point at Aiden "is better?!"

"Ems-" Nolan tries to calm me down.

"No, don't." I move away from him "Wanna know what better is? Better is going to be when Aiden wakes up, looks at me with those angel eyes and calls my name with that beautiful British accent he's got. That, Dr. Hunt, is what better looks like"

I don't wait for an answer as I leave the room. I run down the hall till I reach a door that says 'Supplies Closet. Authorized Personnel Only'. Fuck them, I enter. I close the door behind me and two seconds later I'm on the floor crying my heart out.

_Flashback_

_"Hey" he says with that delicious British accent "thought I'd come check on you, I know it's been a rough day." He looks at me "You alright?"_

_I sigh and take a few steps forward "You keep asking me that."_

_"And you never give me an answer" he says._

_I just stare at him for a few seconds. Why? Why is he here? Why won't he stop chasing me? Why does he have to be so charming when I'm trying to be mad at him? I need to know why because my shield becomes weak when he's around me, it's like he can see right through me. Why does he have this power over me? It was so hard for me to forget him when he left and now he's back. He's here, right in front of me. I look at his deep blue eyes one more time till I can't take it no more. _

_I throw my arms around his neck and kiss him deeply. He kisses back and brings me closer to him by placing one arm around my waist while the other holds my necks. He definitely broke the walls._

"Ems?" A voice says bringing me back to reality "I miss him too" it's Nolan.

"I, I didn't hear you" I whip some tears away "How long have you been in here?" I ask.

"I just got here. You're a rebel, hiding in unauthorized closets." he puts a hand on my back. "I miss him too and if you need to cry, I understand, but don't shut me out Ems. I'm here for you, I'm here with you"

I look at him in the eyes and that is enough to make me break down again. I throw myself in his arms and I feel him start crying as well. This is us now, two reckless and hopeless friends crying over a loved one.

We stay like that, none of us speaking, none of us pretending to be okay, because we both know it's not necessary. We both know what we need, we need support. We're both being here for each other, we're just being. Isn't that the point of if all? To be?

**I hope you liked it! Please review :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi**!** Thanks for all the reviews so far you guys are awesome. I'm sorry if this chapter is kind of short to you. Please keep reading and commenting if you like it or if maybe I should fix something. Enjoy!**

Next day Emily/Amanda's POV

Here I am waiting. It's already been 5 hours and I'm still waiting. I'm in the waiting room, my head resting on my hands. It already dark outside, I'm tired and sick of being in a hospital full of sadness and depression. I know I'm not the happiest person ever to be alive but that doesn't mean I like bad things to happen.

"Hey you wanna go back to his room?" Nolan asks from beside me.

"We've already been there 6 times now and I'm tired of walking." I answer sharply. I know he's just trying to keep me distracted but I'm just not in my best temper right now.

"Okay" he answers "Uhm do you...want a candy? I've got chocolates too"

"No thanks, I'm fine" I say as I give him a little smile.

"No you're not. You haven't eaten anything all day" he takes the chocolates out and puts them in front of me "Grab one"

I look at him and then back at the chocolates. "Okay, this look good" I answer as I take one.

"This are good" he shoves some in his mouth. I laugh.

"Nolan! Emily!" I hear a voice calling us from behind. It's Jack. "I came as soon as I could. Why didn't you guys tell me before? I thought he was dead."

I wince and look at my feet with that last word. I clear my throat trying to brush my moment of weakness off. I like Jack but he needs to be more careful with his words.

"I don't know, it didn't occur to me." I know it sounds bad but it's the truth. I didn't think about him, I was only thinking about Aiden.

"It's okay." he sits down in front of us "How's he doing?"

"He's still in surgery. It's been five hours so we guess he'll be out soon." Nolan answers.

"Nolan told me about the leg." Jack says as he grabs my hand "I'm truly sorry about how things turned out."

_Flashback_

_"What about your mother? Won't she be there too?" Aiden asks me._

_"She booked a flight to Colorado Springs this morning" I answer. Why does he gave to ask about her?_

_"And you're okay with that?" He says._

_He knows me too well, he knows I care about her, but why is he asking? Does he care? No, how could he, he's the one who left me in the first place._

_"The sooner she gets out from under that roof the better for everyone." I answer coldly. Not letting any emotions show, just like Takeda taught us._

_I shift in my seat a little and he grabs my hand without a warning. He wraps his hands around mine and looks at me in the eyes, oh my god those eyes. I'm in some kind of daze as I look into those eyes. I don't move, I can't move._

_"I'm genuinely sorry for how things turned out with her" he says never breaking eye contact "I know you wanted more."_

_Oh god he makes it so difficult to hate him. His touch feels...right, as if he could help, he's touch gives me hope. Focus Emily, I tell myself, you're not letting him in. Takeda would be so disappointed. I follow my brain and pull my hand away._

_"It's probably for the best" I answer simply._

I break out of my daydream and pull my hand away from Jack's. I stand up and look around.

"Ems?" I hear Nolan ask.

This is the first time I've taken my time to look at the other families in the waiting room. They're all tired, you can see it in their eyes. They all want to be out of here, they all want to be somewhere else, they all want to be happy. But the circumstances right now are not like that, they're all sad and lonely and grieving.

"Was it too soon?" Jack asks Nolan as if I couldn't hear them.

"No, no, you didn't say anything wrong" Nolan answers.

I can't move because if I move I'm afraid I'm going to lose control. I've been holding my emotions all day and if I do anything else right now I'm going to explode, I don't care who's watching.

"Emily are you okay?" Jack places a hand in my shoulder.

"Am I okay?" I answer almost in a whisper.

"I know what a stupid question. I'm sorry Emily, about everything, I really am." He says.

"Am I okay?" I repeat "I don't, I don't think so. I'm not okay" I admit.

"He's out of surgery" Dr. Hunt says as he enters the waiting room.

I walk towards him immediately with Nolan and Jack right behind me.

He continues "There were some obstacles but he got through them and-"

"What obstacles?" Jack asks cutting him off.

"Uhm we almost lost him twice, but as I was saying he got through that and he's now in post surgery recovery." the doctor answers.

My breath stops for a second and I grab Nolan's hand. He squeezes and asks "Can we see him?"

"Are you family?" He answers.

"No, none of us are." Nolan answers.

"Is that a rule?" Jack protests beside me "We're his friends, he's got no family."

"Yeah I'm sorry, family only" he looks down.

"I'm his fiancée." I finally say "Does that count?"

"Of course" he smiles sweetly "Are you ready to go?" He motions me to follow.

And so I do. I follow him through a couple of halls trying to respond to Dr. Hunt's chitchat as best as I can in this moment. I'm scared, I'm scared of what I might find. He's doing good and his leg will recover but I'm scared anyways.

"We're here" Dr. Hunt says as he stops in front of a door "I'll be going through some charts, if you need anything just tell a nurse to page me. Are you going to be okay?"

I'm not, I think. "I am" I say.

He nods and leaves. I grab the door knob and open it. I walk in a large room divided in four. There's three beds with at least one person around it. But there's one all alone with the curtains still closed, and I know that's Aiden's. I slowly walk towards it. In and out, in and out...just breathe. I open the curtains to find him there, unconscious lying in bed.

"Baby" I take a deep breath and continue "Wake up baby." I sit beside him "I, I know it's scary and you're not sure how to do it but you gotta try because you're a fighter and you can do this. You" I grab his hand "are the strongest person I've ever met."

A tear drop from my eyes and I brush it off "Jack said something before about you having no family. But you do have, your mom. I'll bring her here, I know she can't afford it but don't worry about that. I'm gonna bring here for you I promise, but you better be awake when she gets here."

I kiss his hand and place it back down.

I grab my phone and search for the number Aiden's mom gave me to call her. It rings for a few seconds and then a voice answers. Okay I can do this.

"Emily?" she says.

"Yeah it's me. How are you?" I ask.

I don't know how to do this. I don't know how to tell a mother, who's a whole ocean away, that her son almost died because a crazy woman tried to kill him as payback. I don't know if I'll be able to tell her the truth. I can't do that, she'd hate me.

"Good, thank you. How about you darling?" She asks me politely.

"Well uhm, I am, I-" I stutter.

"Is everything okay sweetie?" She says.

Ok this is it, I have to tell her. "No, not really. Harriet, there's been an accident."

* * *

"Do you have what I asked you for?" I ask Nolan as I gather my stuff.

"Yes I'll email it to you right away" He answers as he takes his phone out. "Do you want me to go with you?"

"No, thanks. You have to stay here and look out for my man." I say pointing at Aiden.

"Okay then, be careful" he puts his phone away "I send you the adress that is most likely to be the one you're looking for."

"Thanks Nolan, I don't know what I would do without you" I smile at him and leave.

Once I'm in my car I take out my phone and check the adress. I asked Nolan to get me Victoria's GPS history from the day she tried to kill Aiden. But since Nolan is such a good friend, he found the only one that could lead to a drug dealer, the only one someone like Victoria Grayson would never visit if she didn't have to. It's in The Bronx, New York. Yeah, Bitchtoria wouldn't go there.

I drive for a long time till I find somewhere to park near the adress. Then I continue my journey walking and you can tell this is not a nice place. I keep on walking for a few minutes until I finally find the apartment I'm looking for.

You might be asking yourself what I'm doing here. Well I think there's more to the story, I know Victoria and she wouldn't be so stupid to buy a drug that takes so long to kill, so I'm here searching for answers. I believe there's something that kept the bitch from buying the right poison. I'm just not sure what. What made Victoria's evil plan no work? And the only person who can help me with this is the drug dealer himself.

I knock on the door twice and wait. I hear some rambling around and then the door opens and a guy pops out.

"May I help you with something Ms...?" The guys asks and you can smell alcohol in his breath.

"Detective Johns" I say as I take my fake credential out. "And yes, you may help me."

"Alright then, come in." he steps aside letting me in.

The place is almost empty, there are a couple of boxes spread around the floor and the smell of cigarettes and alcohol is strong.

"To what do I owe this pleasure?" He says from behind me.

"I would like you to enlighten me." I turn to look at him. "A couple days ago a woman named Victoria Grayson came to your house asking for something. What did she want? And, what did you give her?"

"I don't remember sleeping with any Victoria." He laughs sarcastically.

"Very funny," I take out my gun "but I ain't got time for jokes."

"Oooh" he laughs again "Tough girl huh?"

"You better cut the crap soon" I point the gun at his face.

"Relax babe" he takes a step forward "We have all day, don't we?" He smirks.

"You know what?" I take a step forward, put the gun down and touch his arm grab his arm bringing him closer. "We don't." I whisper in his ear.

Then I hit him in t. he groin as hard as I can and he falls to the floor. I keep on kicking him till he stops moving. His kind of skinny which makes it easier for me to carry him. This guy is going to have to talk eventually.

I leave the guy tied up and locked in Grayson manor since no one lives there anymore and I still can't go inside my house because of the night I thought Aiden was dead is still in my head. Then I head to the airport because I've got more important things to do right now, I have to pick Harriet from the airport. She must be devastated, her son was dying across the ocean and she could do nothing but hoe and pray. But she won't have to worry because I'm going to be here for her. I never had a mom but I do know something about them, their love for their children is infinite. One thing I know for sure is that Harriet loves her son and she would do anything for him.

* * *

"Nolan, this is Aiden's mom Harriet" I say as we enter the room "Harriet, this is Nolan my best friend and Aiden's friend too"

Nolan stands up, smiles, and extends his hand towards her "It's so nice to meet you, I now see where Bond here got his good looks from."

"Thank you darling, it's nice to meet you too" she answers as they shake hands.

"We're gonna step outside so you can have some privacy" I smile at her sweetly and motion Nolan to follow me.

Once we're outside the room Nolan speaks "What did you tell her? Did you tell her the whole truth?"

"Calm down. Of course I didn't she would hate me. The doctors are obviously going to mention the poisoning to her so I told her that some terrorist must have done it, that we're not sure yet." I answer.

"I'm sorry Ems, but I still feel like her being here is not the best idea. If she ends up finding out its going to be terrible and-" he says.

"You think I don't know that?" I cut him off "You think I don't spend my entire day imagining tge worst consequences?"

"I'm not trying to judge you here, okay?" He makes me look at him raising my chin "I'm sorry Ems, I wanna help you anyway I can."

I wanna say something harsh and cold but I can't because I know Nolan's not trying to make me feel bad. "Then trust me on this one. Everything will be fine."

**So I know it was short I'm so sorry! I hope you enjoyed it and leave reviews:)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hi! I'm so s again if this seems like too short but I feel like it's enough. Thanks again for your reviews (aimilyforever, whoever left a review as guest, snow456, my194, heeman) I'm sorry if I didn't call your name or if you didn't want me to. Okay that's it I guess. Keep reading and leave all the reviews you want :)**

Emily/Amanda's POV

"Good morning sunshine" I say as I walk in the manor's basement "I hope you're chatty today."

"Get me the fuck out of here, bitch" he spits.

I left him here the whole night because I wanted to stay by Harriet's side. He's still sitting where I left him yesterday.

"Oh don't worry honey. You'll soon be either out of here or in the cemetery digging up your grave" I smile ironically.

I put the bag I was caring on top of a wooden table and open it. I keep all my weapons in it and today I'm gonna have to use it. I take out a knife and swing it from one hand to another to get use to it. Yeah, I haven't used my weapons for a while.

"New game, my rules. You speak and you don't, you don't speak..." I point the blade at him "Easy game, right?"

He growls and I take that as a yes. I move closer to him till I'm beside him. I slide the knife through his arm slightly. I'm not giving up this time, I'll torture until I get the answers I'm looking for. Just like Takeda taught me, no mercy.

"What did Victoria Grayson asked for?" I ask.

He stays silent. Oh god this guy is really stubborn. I put the blade under his chin and that makes him speak "She wanted something to kill a person quickly so I offered her Aconite, also known as wolf's bane. This poison can take hours to kill but with large doses death is almost instantaneous."

"The doctors said he was infected with tetrodotoxin, why?" I ask harshly as a grab him by the hair and pull it back.

"I made her think I was giving her aconite but gave her tetrodotoxin instead." He answers.

"Why?!" I punch him in the stomach.

He growls and answers "Because someone made me do it! This guy was waiting in my room, where I keep my products, and he threatened to kill me if I didn't give sell her a slower poison."

"What? Someone saved him?" I say as let go of his hair "Who?"

I don't get it. Who was it? I thought Aiden had no other friends or family besides me and Nolan. A man? Aiden has never mentioned anyone.

"I don't know him. He's tall and big. He said he's leaving town that afternoon, that I shouldn't try to find him" He says.

"Fuck!" I lost the only opportunity to know who that person is and why he saved my Aiden.

I grab him by the collar of his shirt and bring him close "If you happen to be lying I swear you'll regret it." Then I push him back and the chair falls bringing him down with it.

"How's he doing?" I ask as I desperately walk in the room.

"It's okay Emily, he's fine now." Nolan answers me as he walks towards me.

"You told me he was crashing." He called me when I was driving back here and told me Aiden was crashing. My heart almost sank when he said that.

"He was Ems" he looks down.

"Isn't he supposed to be getting better?! What are this doctors doing?! Are they even helping him?!" I shout.

"Darling look at me." I hear Harriet say from her seat beside the bed. I do and she continues "They're doing their best, okay? It isn't their fault. I know how you're feeling but we got to be patient."

"I just, I'm sorry, I want him to be alright. I constantly have this feeling, it's like I'm scared all day that something could happen to him."

"Come here" she motions me to the chair beside her. I make may way over there and sit. "That, my dear Emily, is called love. Do you know where it comes from?" She raises her hand and places it on my heart "Here. And even though that feeling hurts like hell, it's worth it."

I don't say anything, I just smile sweetly back at her. She's so wise and sweet. Oh my god I wish I had a mother like her. I keep staring at her as she caresses Aiden's hand. She's unbelievable, how can she be so strong? I change my gaze at Nolan and he smiles back at me as if he could read my thoughts, we're both admiring this woman's heart.

"Wanna hear a story of Aiden as a kid?" She asks.

Aiden's always been bad at talking about himself. Our conversations are mostly about me, my dad, my life, and I just realized it. He never shared something with me about his life as a kid. "I would love that" I answer.

"When he turned six he was obsessed with batman and he would go to school dressed as batman at least three days a week. He even got in the baseball league so they'd call him the bat-boy." We all laugh "Then all of the sudden a girl started dressing as batgirl. One day some little girls started messing around with her and Aiden, literally, jumped out of the window to attack the girls. He thought he could fly because of his cape. Luckily he only jumped off the first floor and broke one arm."

"Oh my god" I say and laugh.

"Seems like 007 has always been protective over his girls" Nolan laughs.

"Oh you should have seen him when he first started dating, he was around thirteen. Her name was Ellie and he took her to an amusement park. He gave her a giant teddy bear and she was head over heels for him." She laughs.

"Who wouldn't be? He's got your eyes." I compliment her.

"Oh darling, you should have seen his father's eyes. They're exactly the same, deep blue ocean" she looks up as if daydreaming.

"Aiden never told me much about his father" I tell her.

"Tough topic" she breathes heavily "They loved each other. His father was a hero to him. His father would take us to his mother's farm every holidays, so he bought him a horse and left it there. Astrology, that's the name he gave the horse. A month later there was a fire and since Astrology was just a baby, she got lost when escaping. His father found her two weeks later and he admired his father ever since. And well Colleen was his little princess. She was definitely a daddy's girl" she laughs.

"He never told me any of this. His father sounds amazing I wish I could've met him, and well Colleen sounds charming too" I smile tenderly at her.

"I miss it, I miss my perfect family. They're all slipping away, you know, and I'm here watching." Her voice cracks at the end.

"Hey, hey" I wrap my hand around hers "You're not alone, I'm here."

"Thank you Emily." she takes a deep breath "For everything, for buying me a flight, for paying for my son's recovery, for supporting me. Thank you so much"

I can't take it anymore, I wrap my arms around her and hold her tight.

She hugs back and I feel safe.

It's been a month since Aiden's almost death, four weeks in coma. Harriet is staying at my beach house while I'm staying in the manor, which is now mine too because the Grayson's had to sell it or starve for the next few years. I should be happy, my revenge is over and I was successful but I'll never be happy while Aiden is in a coma. The doctors said he's really doing better and that they could see him waking up soon. I'm praying for that to be true. I also miss my dad, I did all of this for him and he won't be able to enjoy it, here, alive. Jack's been working non stop since he joined the police, Nolan and Harriet are at the hospital watching out for my guy right now and so I'm alone. Actually I'm not, I'm babysitting Carl, he counts. We were watching a movie, or I was watching a movie, but I got bored so I put him to sleep and now I'm making myself scrambled eggs. I look at my hands as I cook and my ring makes me smile.

_Flashback_

_"When you and I first met we'd both lost so much and faced a dark pain, but out of that pain came something beautiful. Love, a love that will always triumph from the darkness, a love that I would lie down my life for." Aiden starts getting down on one knee and my heart skips. Oh my god I can't believe what my eyes are seeing. He smiles goofily and I can't help but smirk "Amanda Clarke," I can't quit the smile out of my face "will you marry me?"_

_I continue smiling and answer "Yes."_

_He lets out a small nervous laugh as he grabs my hand. We both keep chuckling slightly as he starts sliding the ring around my finger, but when it's almost all the way in I take a deep breath. This is it, I'm happy, I'm safe. He stands up and I throw my arms around him immediately. We kiss tenderly but full of passion at the same time, full of love. This man is mine and I love him._

Okay no, I can't do this, I can't mourn him every second of everyday. Can I? Is it possible to love someone so much that you can't stop thinking about him? I've never been good at relationships and I'm afraid I'll mess it all up. He was my first love, literally, he was my first boyfriend. I just wasn't that kind of girl who would go out with every single man they know and well I'm not a lesbian so I had no relationships back in juvie. Yes, what you're thinking is true, he was my first. I remember being so nervous about telling him but I had to.

_Flashback_

_"What did you wanna talk about?" Aiden asks me as we start jogging around the beach._

_We're skipping our last fifteen minutes of training because I want to talk. He agreed but only if we continued jogging and now here we are. I've been trying to talk to him for a while now but my nerves always get in the way._

_"Well I have to tell you something" I answer._

_"I imagined that" he laughs and starts jogging faster._

_"Funny" I catch up to him "Okay, so there's something I haven't told you yet."_

_"And what would that be?" He keeps looking straight ahead "Hey how about we go for a swim? Or a shower?" He smirks._

_"Aiden, pay attention!" I say as I stop running._

_"Oh, sorry" he stops running and walks towards me "What's up?"_

_"Well we've been going out for a while now and I think there's something really important to me that I should tell you." I start " So I've lived a pretty busy life and I've never had the time to get into romantic relationships. I've never told you this but you're my first boyfriend. Uhm I know I can be cold sometimes but you're the one person who I've opened up to completely. And it scares me, I don't wanna ruin this, I don't to ruin us. I guess that's why I haven't told you what I'm about to tell you, because I'm scared I won't be enough, or good, or good enough. If I'm terrible at it, I'm going to be so embarrassed. Now I'm just totally rambling and this is not like me. Can you see the effect you have on me?I'm totally messing this up, oh my god-"_

_His lips shut me up. Then he speaks "Emily, what is it?"_

_"Oh come on! Don't act like you have no clue about what I'm trying to explain here" I answer._

_"I wanna hear you say it" he smirks as he moves closer to me._

_I look at him in the eyes. This is it, is now or never. I take a deep breath and let it out "I'm a virgin."_

_He smiles, oh god that smile. I feel his arms wrap around my waist and he starts leaning in "And I love that."_

_"Oh, you do?" I smirk. I grab his neck and pull him down so our lips meet._

My phone ringing brings me back to reality. I take it out from my pocket and answer.

"Emily?" It's Harriet "He's awake."


	4. Chapter 4

**Hi! So I think some of you might like this chapter and some might disagree with the decisions I made. If you dondon't understand the reasons wait because some other future chapters will explain Emily's decision. I hope you don't stop reading, please review!**

I run through the halls of the hospital with Carl in my arms. Even though I'm doing my best I can't reach Aiden's room fast enough. It feels like way more corridors than usual and I'm starting to freak out. After Harriet told me he's awake, I immediately answered that I was in my way and hung up. Then I grabbed my purse and Carl, and came **here.** I see his room, finally. I run inside and stop when I realize that I scared everyone.

"Take him" I order Nolan as I move Carl towards him.

He does without a word, just how I like it. As I walk over to Aiden I realize that his eyes are moving and I let out the air I didn't know I was holding. But then something strange happens, his body stays still, he doesn't even try to reach me.

"Aiden?" I whisper. He does nothing. "Aiden? Aiden, Can you hear me?"

"He can, but um he can't move" Harriet answers "He is in some sort of paralysis, he can only move his eyes."

"Can he talk?" I ask worried.

"No" Nolan answers this time "I'm sorry Ems."

I open my mouth to say something but nothing comes out. I can't answer it's like I'm the one paralyzed here. So I won't hear his adorable British accent? I won't be touched by his wonderful hands? For how long? Why is this happening?

I turn to look at him again and his gorgeous eyes are looking right back at me, but differently. I can feel it, his eyes are weird, he's got the same deep blue, but he-he's scared and confused. I've stared at those eyes too many times in my life, I can recognize any feeling.

"The doctor told us that it could take hours, days, or even weeks till he comes out of that state." Harriet tells me. "He, he uhm also said that" she clears her throat "they aren't certain if this is only a temporary thing." She looks away trying to hide her tears.

I slowly walk towards her and wrap my arms around her. It's so weird how this family has lead me to be affectionate but I can't help it when she looks so fragile, I just want her to be okay.

"It's okay, it's okay" I whisper. "He's gonna get through this, he always does."

"I'm sorry, I'm such a mess" she pulls away and starts cleaning her tears.

"Hey, hey" I gently grab her shoulders . "It's okay to cry, it's actually good. You can let it all out but that doesn't mean you're not strong, okay?"

"Mhm" she answers weakly.

* * *

"No, it's okay Nolan. I tell him as we walk back to Aiden's room. We were out dropping Harriet off at the beach house and Carl off at his house.

"I can stay if you want me to." He replies as we stop walking at Aiden's door.

"Nolan you've stayed almost every night. Go home, you deserve it." I smile at him.

"Alright alright, I'll leave but first let me say goodbye to-" he's cut off by a sound, like a sobbing, coming from Aiden's room.

I look at Nolan, who has a worried expression all over his face, and then back at the room. I slowly walk towards the door, the sound becomes louder. If Harriet's home, who else could it be?

I open the door in a flash to find a completely black figure with a black mask. Great. "Who the hell are you?"

The person runs to the window dropping some metallic thing on the floor in the way. I run to grab it as he or she struggles opening the window. It's a ring, it's Aiden's ring. Who the hell is this person?

I look back to find my mystery guy gone. What?! Did that person seriously just jumped off the window? We're in the second floor for God's sake! I run out of then room with a confused Nolan asking me "What's going on?!"

"I can't explain now, gotta run!" I shout as I make my way to the stairs.

I'm outside of the building in less than a minute, but my guy's gone.

"Damn it!" I shout at the air.

Who the fuck is able to jump out of the window and not break a thing?! This person definitely has skills but no one better than me. I'm gonna find this person, I have to.

"Who. The Hell. Was. That?" I hear Nolan say between breaths.

"I don't know!" I shout at him. "That, that person had Aiden's ring! Nolan I know that ring wasn't here before so who ever that was has had the ring all along!"

"I know Ems, calm down." He says. "We're going to find him, don't worry."

"This has to be the man that drug dealer was talking about. Nolan, what if he's been here before and we never noticed? Aiden's not safe here!" I point at the building.

"Ems, wait a second and think about it. If this man saved him, why would he wanna harm him now?" Nolan's got a point.

"I don't know?" I answer softly. "I'm just trying to look out for him, okay? I'm staying here from now on."

"Ems come on, that's kind of too much, don't you think?" Nolan says.

"No, I don't think so" I answer an push past him. How can he say that? If Aiden needs me I'm going to be here for him, no matter what.

I hear Nolan call after me but I don't stop. I'm confused but determined, and I'm going to hunt that person down.

* * *

It's been two days since Aiden woke up. From 48 hours, he has slept almost 38 hours. He's eyes are always either tired, confused, scared or in pain. My poor baby, he must be so confused about everything, his leg must be hurting a lot because it's still not completely recovered. I just wanna hear his voice calling for me and hands touching me. Oh my god when is this stupid paralysis going to end. His face has started to move a little more so that's good. The doctors still take him for exams two to three times a day. His leg is also improving but the doctors said they don't think he'll be walking right away after he snaps out of this paralysis, if he ever does.

"Hey!" Nolan says as he enters the room. "How's 007 doing?"

"He's doing better, his facial muscles are coming back." I answer and take a deep breath.

"That's good news." He answers cheerfully. "So I forced Harriet to eat something from the cafeteria, she's now in the chapel."

"Good thing she's at least eating." I try to be positive.

"Uhm, how about you follow her footsteps and go eat something too?" Nolan suggests. "Or maybe we could go and redecorate your new house, how awesome does that sound?"

"How about you follow her footsteps for me, huh?" I snap. "I'm sorry."

"It's fine." He brushes it off. "Jack called, he said things at work are crazy busy but he'll try to-"

A cough cuts him off, it's Aiden. I stand up and grab his hand, it's the first sound he has made in months. He clear his throat repeatedly and I start to get worried.

"Nolan, what's happening?" I ask concerned.

"I don't know." He answers clearly worried himself.

Aiden starts breathing faster and tries to move his mouth.

"He's trying to talk." Nolan says stating the obvious.

"It's okay, shh." I try to soothe him. "Just breathe Aiden, I'm here."

His breathing calms down a bit but he keeps on clearing his throat. Then he opens his mouth slightly. Oh my god he actually opened his mouth, now his entire face is paralysis free. He's trying to make up words but all that comes out are tiny hisses.

"Should we call the nurse?" Nolan asks.

"No, just let him." I say. "He can do this, I know he can."

Nola obeys while Aiden keeps on hissing. My poor baby, I think. But I can't stop him, he's so close, he's so close to speaking again. Then it happens, he actually does it.

"C, c-" he clears his throat once again.

I grab his hand tighter as a tear slips down my cheek and a happy little laugh comes out of me. I'm so happy, right now, right here.

"Co, coll-" he coughs. "Collen!"

"What?" I ask almost unbearably.

"Collen, you," He says as he gives me one of his melting smiles. "you're back."

"What? Is he talking to me?" I turn to look at Nolan, who just shrugs his shoulders. "What the hell?"

"Colleen you came back." He laughs. "I thought I lost you."

He's definitely talking to me, he's starting directly at me. "Oh my god." I say as cover my mouth with my hand.

I grow weak in the knees as I realize what's happening. He thinks I'm his sister. Is he just confused? Did he forget about me? Did he forget Amanda?

Nolan decides to step in "Aiden, are you okay?"

"I'm sorry." Aiden clears his throat. "Who are you?"

"Uhm, Nolan?" He replies and waits for an answer. Aiden just keeps on looking at him strangely. "Your friend Nolan Ross? Your Hamptons buddy?"

Aiden just shakes his head as he brings his hand to his throat and starts massaging it.

"You seriously don't remember me?" Nolan asks hurt.

"No, sorry." He says, he's eyes showing how painful speaking is being for him right now.

Amnesia? Really God, anything else? Don't you think the paralysis is enough? He doesn't remember who I am, who Nolan is. I can't take it anymore, I have to leave this room as soon as possible. So I start walking away. I hear him calling for me, or Colleen, but I don't stop. Tears start streaming down my face as I go out the door. As soon as I'm out I don't know where to go, so I run towards the only private place I know here, the supplies closet.

* * *

I re-enter the room to find Harriet sitting beside Aiden, who looks like he's sleeping. I've come up with a decision that I might regret but it's decided and now it's time to let them know.

"Nolan, Harriet," I grab their attention. "May I have a word with you?"

"Yeah sure" Nolan answers.

"Has any of you talked with him while I was away?" I ask.

"No, he felt asleep before I got here." Harriet replies. "Why darling?"

"This is going to sound strange but I want to ask you both that I can count on you." They keep staring at me unsure of what's to come. "I was thinking, uhm, and I came to a decision that you may not agree with but I wanna do it."

"Okay..." He says this time.

Just tell them, I think. "Um, I want Aiden to believe I'm his sister. I don't want him to remember me as Emily."

"Are you saying you're gonna let him think you're Colleen?" Nolan asks. "Why would you do that?"

"Well, as I said before I don't expect you to understand but the least I can do for you is explain." I take a deep breath and continue. "I, I have done some pretty bad things as Emily, and I love Aiden, and I don't want him to know that person. I wanna be better, better for him."

"But, Emily, you can't be his sister if you love him romantically." Harriet says.

"I know that. I'm going to give up a romantic relationship with him to get another chance at being the best I can be for him. Please," I look at each of them. "I know I'm asking you to lie, but please."

"Honey, are you sure?" Harriet grabs my hand. "You've done so much for me but I need to know. Are you sure you want this? Are you sure you want to give up your love for him?"

"I'm never gonna stop loving him, Harriet. But I am sure, I'm willing to do this."

"Ems, this is crazy!" Nolan speaks up. "How are you even considering this?"

"Nolan, please, I'm asking you to agree with me." I turn to him. "Please."

"No! Harriet how can you agree?" He starts backing away. "Aiden loves Emily!"

"He doesn't remember Emily!" I answer.

"No, no, no" he starts walking away. "I can't, I can't."

And with that he leaves the room. Oh god, I hate fighting with Nolan.

"Emily you have to know that I'm doing this because I care for you and because you really want this, but I don't like lying, not to my son. I know how it feels to want another chance and I'm giving it to you, so don't screw it up." Harriet says.

"I know, I won't screw this up. I care for him too much to harm him. Thank you Harriet, thank you so much for understanding." I hug her.

This kind of things come naturally when it comes to her. I like hugging her, I like talking to her. It feels so safe, so mother and daughter-ish.

**So okay I know this is a weird decision but just try to understand me. Please review!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey! This chapter is short too but again I think it's enough. I forgot to tell you guys, I speak Spanish so I'm sorry if I'm not that good at writing (I do my best). If you have any suggestions or comments, REVIEW! I hope you like this episode. **

Emily/Amanda's POV

It's been a two weeks since Aiden first spoke. The doctor explained us that he's got a retrograde selective amnesia, which means that he will be unable to recollect events that occurred before the amnesia set in but the memories selected by his brain. In my own words, he remembers when he left his home to find Colleen and back. But he doesn't remember anything after that, he doesn't even remember he worked as a bartender for months to save his sister. He doesn't remember anything about Japan, or his mission, or the Hamptons. He doesn't remember who the Graysons are, who Jack is, who Nolan is, who Takeda is, who I am. He is now the one person who doesn't know Amanda nor Emily. The doctor said this could be a temporary thing as much as it could be a permanent thing, they can't predict anything. And so we've told him what we can without ruining my plan. We didn't mention Japan, we didn't mention his mission, we didn't mention me. We told him that he did find Colleen (or me) and that she/I moved here to get a new life away from home. We told him that he and his mother were visiting me when this happened. We told him that I lost my accent because I was just a little girl surrounded by Americans. Nolan, Harriet and I agreed that filling his gone memories with happy ones was the best idea. Nolan still thinks that my being Colleen is a bad idea but he's going on with it because he's my person and he would do anything for me.

"So Harriet is safe and sound at the beach house along with little Carl." Nolan says bringing me back from my thoughts. "That kid's making her grandmotherly instincts come out." He sits down beside me and waves his hand towards Aiden.

I think about it for a second. How Aiden and I could have had children, little versions of us, running around a bright and humble home. But Victoria's son took that from me, and I'm not supposed to think romantically about us anyways.

"Yeah, she would be good at that job." I smile to myself as I imagine her holding my child in her arms.

Then Dr. Hunt steps in caring a wheelchair with him. "Hey, how's our invincible British patient doing?"

"I'm here, starting to move some more muscles." Aiden replies.

"Yeah, you've been doing great with that and that's the reason why I'm here. Since your hips have been paralysis free for a week now, I'm here to offer you to take the next step. How does that sound?" The doctor asks.

"That sounds great." He answers. "What's the next step?"

"I think it's time for you to change your position so you're going to sit down in this wheelchair, no more beds for transportation, and someone" he turns to me and Nolan. "can take you out of these god damn walls and give you a tour around the hospital."

"Really? He's ready to do that?" I ask more cheery than I expected to.

"He absolutely is." Dr. Hunt smiles and continues. "I'm gonna call the nurses to come prep him up." He leaves.

"We're gonna take you out for a walk or ride, whatever, how cool is that James Bond?" Nolan says cheerfully.

"You keep calling me like that, did you always do that?" Aiden asks. We told him Nolan was a friend he made the first time he visited here and that he always hang out with him when he comes from England.

"Sometimes." Nolan smiles.

"Colleen, you're coming right?" He looks at me with those angel eyes.

"Of course." I answer softly as I stare into those eyes I love.

* * *

We're walking around the hospital now, it took about ten minutes to get Aiden ready, but here we are.

"You know I've realized hospitals are better than what people say. So I watch this TV show called Grey's Anatomy and there's tons of drama hidden between the doctors and the nurses, ooh the nurses are like Gossip Girl, which another TV show." Nolan tells Aiden. He's such a fan girl.

"You sound like a teenager in her fangirling state." Aiden laughs.

"Hey there's nothing wrong with fangirling, okay?" Nolan defenses himself. "In fact fan girls are quite awesome."

"Alright kiddos, it's enough." I say as I grab the wheelchair from Nolan. "We're going to do this everyday till you fully recover, alright Aiden?"

"Sure" he answers not so cheery.

"What's wrong?" I ask. I know Aiden all too well to not notice there's something odd about his behavior.

"I'm just hospital sick." He replies. "I wanna be out of here and go to the beach with you and mum, like we used to, remember?"

"Uh yeah." I lie. "Well as soon as the doctor lets us take you home we can spend the entire day at the beach."

"I'm invited too right?" Nolan asks.

"Obviously, you're supposed to be one of my closest friends right?" Aiden answers. "I still find it weird that I can't remember anything, I'm sorry. Like how did I rescue you Colleen?"

"Uhm I don't really like to talk about it ," He's been asking about this for a while. "but let's say you acted like one brave hero and saved me from those evil guys."

"I'm glad you're safe, and happy, and alive." He looks into the distance. "For a while I thought you were dead and it was the worst feeling I've felt in my entire life."

I hesitate before answering. It pains me to lie to him. "But I'm not dead, I'm here." I give him my best fake smile.

"You are." He smiles widely. Oh my god I missed that smile.

"Okay let's go back, this one needs to get some rest because soon he'll be walking out of this place." Nolan says as he takes Aiden from me and starts wheeling him inside the building.

We make our way to the elevator and then to Aiden's room being extra careful not to bump into anything because that will only hurt him more than he is right now. My poor baby is so fragile, so not himself. But he's going to get better, everything's gonna be better from now on.

We enter the room to find a someone's back towards us, a female's. She turns her body around and I can't believe it. It's Niko, Niko as in gone Niko, as in Aiden's ex Niko, as in the one who tried to kill us Niko. What the hell is she doing here? I thought she was gone, gone forever.

"Surprised to see me?" She says and laughs sarcastically.

"What are you doing here Niko?" I reply.

"What do you think I'm doing, huh? I came to check on Aiden." She takes a few steps forward.

"Niko wait, wait please, let's talk first." I say.

"I didn't come here to talk to you, I came here for Aiden." She snaps.

"Who is that? Is she from England or something like that? She's got an accent too." Aiden asks from behind me.

That's when Niko's face changes to pure confusion. "What the heck?" She whispers.

"Come with me, I'll explain everything." I say and start walking out. I hear footsteps following me.

Once we are outside she asks me immediately "What was that about?"

"Niko, Aiden has gone through a lot since you left." I start. "Victoria tried to poison him but he got to the hospital just in time or a little latter. He's was in a coma for a month and he's been slowly recovering from a complete body paralysis for three weeks now. And he also suffers from a loss of memory, he remembers everything till the time he started searching for his sister."

"Oh god, that's horrible! I'm gonna kill that bitch and her children, each one of them." She says angrily but there's something off with her face, her expressions, I can't quite grasp what.

"There's something else you should know." I grab her attention once again. "Uhm we're telling him that I'm his sister. We told him that he found me and went back to England. There's no Japan nor any missions. I know you may not understand but please don't tell him who I truly am, it's better for him."

She stares at me for a few seconds "Why would I do that? Why would I lie to him for you?"

"I know it's a lot to ask but I truly believe it's best for him too. Do it for him." I answer.

She looks back at the room, then at me. "Fine."

"Why'd you come back? Who told you that he was here?" I finally ask what has been eating me inside.

"I care for him despite everything that's happened. So I came back to work things out, to at least be his friend." She takes a deep breath. "But when I went to the beach house you guys weren't there, so I went to ask that friend of yours Jack and he told me you guys should be here. As soon as he told me that Aiden was in the hospital I stormed out and came here."

She still cares about him, and I can't stop that because I'm supposed to be his sister. I look down at my shoes and answer. "He probably doesn't remember you but you can go in now." I open the door for her.

"Oh why thank you" she sarcastically says as she walks in the room.

I follow. Aiden's now back in his hospital bed. Both men look up at us. "Aiden this is-"

"I'm Niko." She cuts me off and walks towards him. "It's fine if you don't remember me, I can answer all the questions you want."

"Did I know you?" He asks.

"Yes, we were lovers once but that ended. I can be your friend now." Wow she's telling the truth I'm gonna have to be careful with this tiger.

"Where did I meet you?" He sits up straighter.

"Sydney, that's also where my mother raised me." She answers.

"That explains the accent." He laughs slightly. "What was I doing in Sydney?" He looks at me and Nolan.

"Work," Nolan replies without hesitation. "You worked there for about a year and a half."

"Yeah" she nods following the game. "Then you left and we reconnect after my father's death."

"Your father is dead? I'm so sorry to hear that." He says politely.

She takes a deep breath before speaking again. "Mhm." She clears her throat.

"You should probably get some rest now" I step in.

"Oh but I wanna now more about the old me." Aiden says. "It's okay I can handle a couple more hours without sleeping I promise."

"If that's what you want-" I answer.

"That what he wants" Niko cuts me off.

Why? Why did she have to come back? Why now when he's most vulnerable? Why her? I wanna grab her and throw her out but I know I can't. I have to let her stay because he wants his memories back and she is part of that. I've always done whatever I want, why should I care now? Because it's for him, and a small, a tiny tiny part of me knows that she deserves to spend time with him, she also loves him. What? Why am I sympathizing with her? What am I thinking? What's wrong with me?But I don't want her to be here, I want her as far away from him as possible, should I throw her out?

Nolan seems to catch my internal battle and says "Colleen and I are going to get something to eat, but when we come back he has to get some rest, those are the doctor's orders."

* * *

Nolan sits down after getting his coffee and says. "Okay now that we're alone, tell me what's going on in that mind of yours. How are you gonna get rid of that girl, huh? Is she getting the red sharpie?"

I laugh sarcastically and look away.

"I was just kidding, no need to get mad." He defends himself.

"I know it's just that-" I stop to get a deep breath. "It's funny because as Emily I've always just gotten rid of the people I dislike, and you just assumed that I was gonna do something about Niko, and it's my fault. I was this careless, selfish little girl but I don't think I want to be that anymore. That's one of the reasons I wanna start again and be another person."

"Colleen." He adds. "Emily you're not careless, do you think a careless person would be paying for another person's recovery, or basically giving her ex boyfriend's mother a house to live in while her son recovers?" He takes my hand. "If you want another chance to fix your mistakes you can have it, but don't insult my best friend because I love her and every single one of her flaws."

"But I don't," I pull my hand away. "I don't like the person I've become. What kind of person almost gets her fiancé dead? It's my fault, everything is my fault."

"Ems, when are you gonna get it? He knew what he was getting himself into, it is not your fault. You are an amazing person to him and you've always been. He loved you for how you were." He says. "Don't be so hard on yourself, you don't deserve it. Yes, you can change your name but you cannot forget Emily because she was a great and strong woman. Embrace yourself Ems, you deserve it."

"Thank you, Nolan. I'm gonna try." I take a drink from my coffee. My mind goes back to Niko and what I should do with her. "What if he likes her? What if she starts visiting every day? What if they become friends, or more? Oh my god I'm not gonna be able to stand her."

"I know but let's think positive, maybe she'll get hit by a bus or a car, who knows?" He shrugs his shoulders.

I laugh, take a sip from my coffee and say. "Okay let's go back I'm not letting Niko have anymore time alone with him."

When we get back, they're both laughing. Niko is sitting beside him and Aiden is still in sitting position. Once Niko spots us she stops laughing, raises her hands up and says. "Okay I'm leaving don't worry."

"It was great to meet you, uhm, again I guess." Aiden tells her. "You should stop by again to continue that story, I mean if you have time."

"I would love that." She smiles at him, and then turns to leave. She tops close beside me and whispers. "Don't worry we didn't talk about you. Your secret is safe with me." And she continues her way out with a big smirk plastered on her face.

Nolan rolls his eyes towards the gone Niko and then asks. "What did you guys talk about?"

"About my time in Australia, and how we met, how we became friends, stuff like that." He shrugs his shoulders. "She's nice, was I close to her?"

"You were for a while but things changed." I answer.

"Oh." He nods slowly. "Hey I think I'm going to start walking soon, I can move my toes now."

"Oh really? Well you're recovering faster than I thought you would, big guy." I smile sweetly at him.

"I'm 007, I'm invincible." He smirks at Nolan.

"Told you, you're totally James Bond undercover." Nolan jokes and we all laugh.

This feels good, just the three of us, having fun, just like old times. I hope it continues this way, I hope nothing gets in our way, because we've had enough. We've gone through so much together and here we are, finally safe, finally better, at least for now.

**Thank you for reading and please please please review because when you do it makes me wanna write more and more.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hi! So this chapter is going to skip sometime, also I have some extremely weird and shocking ideas for this fanfic so hold on. Thaaanks for the reviews but you guys have stopped reviewing that much and I love getting your lovely comments so please keep it up. I know Colleen is older than Aiden in the TV show but I just wrote that she's younger because I think it suits better. Someone commented something about Harriet becoming a grandma, and let me tell you, I've been thinking the same exact thing for a while now. What do you guys think? Should I make her a grandmother? Also in this chapter there's a flashback and there's like two sentences that I couldn't quite catch because of Aiden's accent I'm sorry, if you happen to know the right words feel free to tell me. Oh and one last thing, if you read the name Trevor and you have no flipping idea of who that is, don't worry it's Aiden's father. Okay that's it, go on and read. I hope you like it!**

Emily/Amanda's POV

It's been a month since Niko reappeared in our lives and it's been annoying as hell. She's always here whether to take Aiden out for a walk, or to keep him company, or whatever excuse she can make up. I'm getting tired of her steeling Aiden away when I'm going to take him out, or when I wanna talk, or when Nolan tries to talk to him. She needs to fuck off. Then on the bright side, Aiden is doing very well, he can now move all of his body except his bad leg, so he still can't walk. The doctor is really positive though, he thinks once the pain goes away Aiden will be walking out of this hospital on his own. And he's happier too, he seems less confused about his sudden loss of memory and he's handling it great. I've noticed that Niko answers every single question he asks with the truth, that makes me worry sometimes that something could slip out and ruin my Colleen facade.

"Hey" Aiden says as he wakes up.

"Hi! How are you doing?" I ask from the seat beside his bed.

"I feel good, my leg hurts a lot less." He smiles. "I wanna try to walk, will you help me?"

"Aiden," I say. "Are you sure you're ready for that?"

He laughs softly. "I'm more than ready Colleen, all I want to do is be out of here."

I look at him and see the same puppy eyes he used to give me when he really wanted something. I can't say no to those pretty eyes. "Okay Speedy Gonzales, just don't tell anyone or we'll get in trouble."

"Those eyes never fail." He smirks. Oh my god I missed that look.

I roll my eyes at him, and partly at myself because of falling for those eyes once again, and stand up to help him. He puts his hands in mine and I help him sit facing the window.

"Your good foot first." I say as he follows my indications and places his foot on the floor.

"I can do this." He says as he nods towards me.

I nod back and let go of his hands. He grabs the border of the bed and slowly and carefully places his other foot down. He starts standing up,and when I hear him wince I immediately grab his elbows to keep him up.

"I'm okay, it just hurts a little." He smiles reassuring me that he's fine.

I let go once again and he brings his other foot up and stars walking. He goes slower than a turtle but that's is absolutely fine with me as long as he's safe.

"You go it! You're walking!" I say as he walks/ limps/ drags himself towards the wall facing his bed.

He laughs and I can't help but happily laugh with him. He finally reaches the wall and rests on it.

"Well that wasn't so hard." He jokes as he breathes heavily.

Nolan enters the room, stares at both of us, points at Aiden, and says "What is my buddy doing over there instead of over there?" He points at the hospital bed. "And what is he doing up with no wheelchair near him? Will you guys care to explain?"

"Aiden took his first steps since the accident." I smile widely.

"What?!" Nolan exclaims. "And you didn't think of waiting till I got here?"

"I'm sorry I broke your heart." Aiden says sarcastically and laughs.

"Oh whatever, I'm fine." Nolan answer in his girly tone and rolls his eyes.

Then Dr. Hunt enters looking down at his charts and saying "Hey everyone, I've got some good-" he stops when he looks up to find his patients on the other side of the room. "I see you've been walking."

"Yes, I'm sorry doc, I shouldn't have." Aiden answers.

"Well you shouldn't have but you did, which is in a way good because you're improving." He walks towards him and offers a hand for Aiden to grab. He takes it and Dr. Hunt helps him walk his way back to the bed. Once Aiden in sitting he continues. "So as I was saying, I've got good news. We're going to discharge you in two days, but you'll still have to come in to check out how you're doing." He smiles at us.

"That's great!" I say and grab Aiden's hand between mine.

"No wheelchair?" He asks the doctor.

"No wheelchair as long as you use the crutches we will be giving you." Dr. Hunt answers.

"Yey! James Bond is gonna be back in the field pronto." Nolan jokes.

"But you've got to take care of yourself. Anyway I'll give you all that chatter latter. Now you have to lay down and relax because you just gave your first steps." He says, nods goodbye and leaves.

* * *

Two days later Emily/Amanda's POV

"Wait let me help you" I tell Harriet as I grab Aiden's bag from the back of my car.

"Thank you, I'll go help Aiden with the stairs." She smiles and does as she says.

We're at the beach house, Aiden's finally out of that stupid hospital and now I'm about to go in my old house once again. I haven't been in there for about three or fours moths. I told Harriet that they should keep the house for as long as they needed it, I've got the manor anyways. Aiden will be staying with Harriet and Nolan will be staying with me for a while.

"Colleen honey, come on in!" Harriet calls me from the front door.

I guess this is it, I'll have to go in there. "I'm right behind you!"

I take a deep breath and walk towards the front door. I can do this, I step inside and a cold air runs through my body. It's okay, it's okay.

"Who's house is this again?" Aiden asks.

"Mine." I answer for the third time today.

"I still don't get it, you bought two houses that are right next to each other because..." He trails off waiting for an answer.

"I had the money and this one was getting old that's it." I say as I take a couple of steps towards the living room.

"Where did you get all this money from?" He follows me to the living room.

Once we get there, my gaze goes immediately to that couch, the couch where 'dead' Aiden was sitting on motionless months ago. Tears threat to come but only one rolls down.

Aiden seems to notice and says "Hey, hey, it's okay we don't have to talk about money."

"It's not that." I answer quietly. "It's just that, that's the couch were I found you that night."

"What happened exactly? I mean who intoxicated me and brought me here?" He looks at me.

Then Harriet steps in. "We're not sure, the police dropped the case and we can't keep thinking or talking about that day anymore. End of discussion." She says sternly and I mentally thank her for helping me with this.

"Let's get you settled down." I change the subject. "Your room is upstairs, want me to help you?"

"Please." He replies and makes his way to the stairs.

I grab his crutches, his arm and I help him all the way up. Once we're upstairs I show him his room, which used to be my room. I'm so happy I got all of my Emily stuff out of these house when I was with Daniel or else my facade would go all the way down.

"Thanks Colleen." He sits in the bed and smiles at me.

"No problem, I'm here to help." I smile back.

I take a look around and I can't help but think about the last time we were together in this room.

_Flashback_

_"I wish my father was here to see this." I say as I stare at the newspaper that has Conrad admitting to terrorism in its cover. We finally took that bastard down._

_"Yeah mine too" Aiden says as he takes a look at the paper and the back at me. "They'd be proud of us, Amanda, we've been through hell and back for them." He smiles._

_"And for each other." I add as I put the paper away._

_"I never believed that I'd find a partner in this, not did I ever think that we'd find peace." He says as he's eyes stare deep into my soul._

_"Oh you have little faith." I smirk._

_"Oh Really? You're going to make like this has all gone according to plan, are you?" he jokes._

_I give him a small chuckle and answer "No but I'm gonna say for the hell out of our victories."_

_I place my hand in his chick and give him a sweet close-mouthed smile while I look at him in the eyes. They're so blue and beautiful as always. A thought that always makes me nervous when I'm around him comes to my mind, but this time it only makes me happy. I wanna say it, I need to say it, so I do. "I love you"_

_I pull him in for a kiss and he leans in. My mind explodes once our lips touch. I finally said it and he feels the same I can tell by the way he's kissing me, deeply and full of emotion. Oh god I love him, I truly truly love him. It feels good, it feels safe, it feels perfect._

I come back from my daydream when I hear Aiden talking again. "Colleen? You okay?"

"Uh yeah yes, I'm sorry." I say as pull my hair away from my face. "I'm going to go now."

"Wait," He grabs my wrist. "Where are you going?"

I pull my hand away not because it's hurting but because I feel so many things when he touches me. "I've got to, uhm, arrange some things in the manor."

"Okay, but come later. I like spending time with you." He says in that delicious British accent he has.i

I nod, turn my back to him, and leave.

All these feelings inside are making me crazy, as hard as I try, I can't stop loving him. I don't think these feelings will ever go away but I'll have to suck it up because I already started this and I can't give up now. Maybe Nolan is right, maybe this is all a mistake, maybe it will take me down. But as Takeda taught me I have to remain in my mission, never give up, never give in.

* * *

I walk inside the beach house after nocking twice to make myself heard.

"Just a sec!" I hear Aiden shouts from upstairs.

I wait by the kitchen as far away from 'the' couch as I can. Some may think I'm crazy, but that couch needs to be burned soon. I'll have to talk with Harriet about it though. A couple minutes later Aiden makes his way down the stairs but not alone, Niko is helping him. What the hell is she doing here? In my house!

"Niko." I acknowledge her.

"Colleen" She fakes a smiles. "Nice to see you."

"You too" I return the smile. "Aiden, I was going to invite you and mom to dinner."

"Oh um, Niko invited me to dinner at her house. We were actually about to leave." He says awkwardly.

Are you kidding me? Fucking Niko, she's stealing my fake family now? Who does she think she is?

"Oh, uhm okay, I'll just- I'll just stay here while you're gone." I stutter. I can't help but be a little sad, I wanted to go out with Harriet and Aiden, the three of us, like a family. And now Niko here is ruining it all.

"We should get going." Niko tells Aiden.

"Yeah, we'll be back home soon. Mum is upstairs, she should be down here any minute." He waves goodbye and Niko helps him out of the house.

"They've been talking a lot lately." I hear Harriet's voice. I look up to find her coming down the stairs. "She's always near him. Nolan told me they had something a few years ago and that she still loves him."

I make my self at home and grab a glass of water trying to look careless about what she's telling me. Don't show your emotions, don't let anyone in.

"But I can tell he never loved her as much as he loved you." She makes her way to the kitchen. "Yes, they might have been together but her left her to search for you, he chose you." She stays silent for a few seconds waiting for an answer but I keep on acting like I don't care. "Are you ready for this? Are you ready to let him go?"

I take a deep breath and turn to look at her. "I don't know, but I'll do it if that's what it takes to make him happy."

"Because you love him, because you love him you're letting him go." She says.

"I guess, yes. I just wish it was easier, you know." I answer.

"Well it's hard to let go, I know because your love towards Aiden reminds me of my love towards Trevor." She smiles sweetly. "It was so hard and well with everything else it was even harder."

"Everything else?" I ask.

"Well people talked about him a lot and it never really stopped so it was hard for me to forget about him. And I also couldn't help but constantly think about how the man I married became a murderer." she replies.

Wait she still believes that? She never heard about Conrad or the re-investigation about flight 197? "Haven't you heard? Conrad Grayson among a group of others were the ones to take that plane down."

"Wha-what are you talking about, darling?" She asks.

"It was all over the news before Aiden's accident, those man forced your husband to place that bomb by threatening him with his daughter's life." I step closer to her and grab her hand in mine. "Your husband's not a murderer." I squeeze her hand.

"Oh my goodness, Emily you don't know how happy you've made me. I knew, I always knew there had to be something else." She laughs a little and smiles at me. "I knew Trevor all too well, he would have done anything for his family."

"He did." I smile back. She hugs me and I accept the embrace by hugging her back. "He protected his family."

* * *

I'm at Takeda's house. Aiden called me about twenty minutes ago asking me to pick him up. I can't believe Niko can still live here after everything that has happened in this place. I'm still a bit upset that Aiden came here, but oh well I'm just the sister I'm not supposed to care.

I nock on the door twice and hear Niko shout "It's open, come on in!" So I do, everything's exactly how it used to be. "We'll be there in minute!" She says this time.

I keep wondering around till I reach an open door to what I guess is the master bedroom because it looks big. I don't go in but something does catch my attention, there are some cloth spread around in the floor and right beside that a mask. The mask along with a some of the cloth are black, as in burglar cloth. That's when my mind clicks. Is Niko in some sort of mission herself? Is she up to something?

"Did you loose your way?" I hear Niko behind me.

I turn around to find her in a tiny bikini rubbing her hair with a towel. "Did you loose your clothes?" I reply.

"Funny." She give me a sarcastic laugh. "Actually Aiden ripped them off of me."

I laugh "You wish."

"I'm ready." says Aiden as he appears behind Niko. "What are we talking about?"

"About how much fun we had at the pool today." Niko smirks at me.

"He's not supposed to be doing that stuff." I answer now more concerned about his health. "His leg's still recovering."

"Swimming is therapeutic Colleen, relax." She says as she puts her hand on my shoulder. I give her my best don't-touch-me-bitch look that I have and she gets the message by turning to look at Aiden.

"I had a great time Niko, thanks for everything." He leans in and gives her a small hug while I stand there staring at them awkwardly.

"Anytime Aiden." She answers as they pull away. Then she gives him peck on the cheek startling both me and Aiden.

Okay now she's really looking forward to me kicking her ass out of the Hamptons. I know she's doing it in front of me to tease me but I won't give her the pleasure.

"Okay, thank you Niko." I smile at her. "Let's go big brother"

I don't wait for an answer as walk myself out of this freaking house. Niko is really getting on my nerves. And now that I found out she's on some kind of mission or something, I can't help but wonder what it is. I don't remember her ever mentioning any other enemy than, than the one who killed her father, Aiden. What if she still want to kill him? Is all of this a trap just to hurt Aiden again? I'm going to find out everything Niko is hiding because I'm not going to let anyone harm Aiden, not again.

**I hope you liked it and again I'm sorry for my bad English :)**


	7. Chapter 7

**Hello! This chapter is going to be a short one, sorry. Please review and leave suggestions if you'd like to. Some unexpected thing may happen in this chapter but stay calm because everything has a reason. Also, I don't own a tumblr but I found two accounts (morerevenge and loveteambadass) that promoted my fanfic and I'm so so thankful because I don't own many social media accounts and I have no way to promote myself lol, so shoutout to those two AWESOME accounts. So yeah keep reading, bye!**

Emily/Amanda's POV

"I need a favor." I say as soon as Nolan opens the door to his house.

"Well hello to you too?" He answers closing the door behind us. "How was your day Nolan? Oh it was great thanks for asking, how was yours?"

"Can you help me or not?" I turn to look at him.

"Okay straight to business, got that." He walks to the living room and sits down. "What's up revenger?"

I follow him and sit down facing him. "I need cameras installed at Takeda's asap." I answer.

"And the reason why revengie Emily is coming back to us is...?" He gives me one of those evil smirks only Nolan can make.

"Aiden's safety. Niko's staying there and I believe she's up to something but I'm not sure what. I-I have this strong feeling that something is off." I tell him.

"Why do you think this?" He leans in interested.

"It's gonna sound stupid." I warn him. "I found some burglar-ish clothes there. I know it sounds like I'm overreacting but I know one thing for sure, and that is that if I have that type of clothes out of my closet it's because I'm in a mission."

"Oh c'mon Ems!" He throws his hands in the air. "Are you seriously asking me to waste equipment in a weird feeling you have because you found what could be a Halloween costume for Gods sake?!"

"Nolan you know I wouldn't be asking if I didn't believe that something is truly going on here." I tilt my head to the side and stare at him straight in the eyes, that always works with him.

He growls and then says "And you know I can't say no to that face, you evil ninja girl."

"I've been called worse." I smirk.

"So now that ninja Emily is back, does that mean my friend Emily is back or do I still have to lie to Aiden about you being Colleen." He says.

"Nolan, don't start with this again." I warn him.

"It's just, you know that weird feeling you're talking about? I've got the same 'weird feeling' about your facade." He highlights weird feeling with his fingers.

"Nolan we've talked about this, please stop." I give a serious look. "Let me know when you get everything done, okay?" I stand to leave.

"No wait, don't be mad. We haven't hung out in forever just stay a little more." He gives me that pleading face he always gives me when he wants something.

"Okay, okay" I give in. "Let's go shopping today, how does that sound?"

He claps his hands and replies "Perfect!"

* * *

"Omg try this one!" Nolan says as he passes me what seems like the hundredth dress I've tried on today.

"Nolan!" I complain but start unzipping it anyways, it's actually kinda cute.

"Emily we haven't shopped in forever you owe it to me." He replies.

"Ugh okay" I step out of the dresser. "How do I look?" I give him a sexy pose.

"Oh no" he says without looking up from his phone.

"What? I actually like how I look in this-"

"No, not oh no to you, oh no to this." His points at the screen, but then he seems to think about it twice and puts it away.

"What is it?" I try to reach his phone but he shoos my hand. "Let me see!"

"No I don't want you to." He crosses his arms around his chest and turns around. "That looks great on you."

I'm not giving up, I'm gonna get that phone. "I know, should I buy it?" I stretch my hand slowly and silently so he doesn't notice.

"Yes! It's fabulous!" He throws his arms in the air with excitement making me freeze in my position.

He still doesn't notice as I slowly grab the phone from his pocket. I quickly unlock it to find some sort of video on. Then I notice it's Niko's house and I realize that this must be the cameras' live stream. But that's not all I see, now I get why Nolan was hiding it from me. It's Aiden and Niko kissing in her pool.

Nolan finally realizes his phone is gone and turns around. "Ems-"

"No, I'm okay, it's fine." I cut him off. "He's my brother now, he can kiss whoever he wants"

I know he doesn't but it but I won't give in. IF I'm gonna do this I have to start acting more like a normal and regular sister. I'll just have to suck my jealousy, sadness, disappointed, and every other feeling up.

"As long as that person isn't going to bring him any harm." He adds. "Why don't you just go up and ask her if she's up to something?"

"Yeah right, because you'd obviously ask a murderer if he's going to murder someone." I answer sarcastically.

"I got it." He grabs his phone from my hands. "But seriously, are you okay?"

"I said I'm fine!" I reply a little louder than I intended to.

He lets me calm down and then says "You don't look okay"

"Look Nolan just take me home, please"

We stay silent as I pay for everything and we head home.

* * *

Nolan and I storm out of the car as soon as we arrive at the beach house. There's three cars parked in my house, what the hell? I run inside two find policemen everywhere. I can't identify anyone, what's going on? What happened? Why are all these people here? I look left and right until I finally find a known face.

"Niko what the hell is going on?!" I storm at her.

"I, I don't know, we just came in here and sh-she was..." She trails off as she looks towards the kitchen.

"She was what?!" I make her look at me. "Concentrate! She was what?!"

"She was dead! She was lying on the floor dead!" She answers.

My mouth hangs slightly open as everything sinks in. I don't need her to tell me who she is, it's obvious who she's referring to. My hands get sweaty and my legs stars weakling.

"Where's Aiden?" I manage to ask.

"He left with the ambulance." She tells me.

"Ems?" I hear Nolan from behind me.

I turn around and throw myself in his arms. Tears start pouring down of my face as I burry myself in Nolan's shoulders. Nolan hugs me tight and I feel him shake every now and then, he's crying too. Why? Why Harriet? Oh my god, no Harriet, not her. How did this happen? I feel Nolan letting go so I let him. He grabs my hand and practically drags me out of the house as he does his best to avoid the policemen's questions. Once outside I realize where he's taking me, the manor. We get there and he leads us upstairs to my room.

He lets go of my hand and says "You can let it all go now"

"Why? Why her?" I cry out. "What happened?"

"The police told me she had a heart attack." He answer softly.

"What the fuck? A heart attack? After all she's been through this is how she ends?! It's not fair!" A cry scapes my body.

"I know, I know. I don't know what to say" He sits down.

I wipe my tears away and say between sobs "Can-can you take me to the hospital? I, I have to be there for him."

Nolan doesn't answer as he stands up weeping a tear away. He but his arm in my back and starts waking. No words are needed when you know the other one is there for you.

* * *

"Aiden!" I shout as soon as I see him. He was inside inside of this sort of private waiting room, I guess they put him here because of the situation.

Aiden turns around and I notice his face is a mess, it's all puffy and red, his eyes are watery and he looks totally beat up. He tilts his head to the side giving me a sympathetic look and then he practically runs towards me. He throws his arms around me and holds me tight. I can't help but start sobbing again, I feel so guilty about everything and he's here hugging me and giving me comfort.

"It's okay Colleen, it's gonna be okay." He soothes my back. Oh my god I can't believe he can be protective and strong in a moment like this, then again he thinks I'm his little sister and he's always been like that when it comes to her.

"I'm sorry. I should have been there, I could have gotten here in time." I say. If I had stayed home, i might have been able to help her, I might have been able to do something, anything.

"No, this is not your fault, do not blame it on yourself." He says softly. "She- she died outright, she-" his voice cracks and he hides his face in my hair.

I feel him shaking and my heart breaks. My strong and tough guy is crying, this is too much. My heart breaks not only because Harriet does no longer exist but because Aiden is broken inside. He's broken and sad and he doesn't wanna show it, but I know him too well. He was the one who found his father dead and now he's theone to find his mother dead too. That's not bad, that's terrible. We stay like that, crying in each others arms, comforting each other, helping each other. It's the least I can do for him. After a couple of minutes I feel him pulling away.

"She loved you, okay?" He holds my face in his hands. "She once told me that even if you never came back she would always love you."

My breathing starts raising. I feel this urge to tell him everything, to tell him the truth, to tell him that she wasn't my mother nor am I his sister. But I can't, I can't give up now. So I nod my head as a tear slips down my face and my lips taste the salty water. "She loved you too," I manage to say. "She loved you and cared for you so much."

He looks down clearly in pain. His mother just died of a heart attack dumbass, what were you expecting? I scold myself. I can't believe I made this woman lie to her son and she didn't even get the chance to tell him the truth. She died lying to her only child left because of me, because I'm so stupid! I'm so stupidly selfish! How could I do that to her? After all she did? After how she treated me?

"I, I have to go." I start walking backwards trying to reach the door.

"Where- where are you going?" He asks confused.

"I'm sorry, I can't, I have to-" I don't say no more, I just leave.

I ignore his calls and storm away. I run as fast as I possibly can in a moment like this, I scape, because I'm afraid, because I'm a coward. I'm not what I was trained to be, I'm not a warrior, I'm not a fighter. I'm just simply and sadly a coward, a god damn coward.

**Okay so I know this one was extremely short but I'm sorry it just feel about right to me. I also know it's a shocker and that you were all rooting for her to be a grandma but things turn out differently sometimes. Please don't worry because it all has a reason and you'll end up happy. I hope you didn't hate it that much and pleeease review!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Hi! I haven't really got any reviews on the last chapter so now I don't know if it was much of a shocker to you guys. This chapter is going to be short and the first one written in someone else's POV so that's cool. Oh and if you can't recognize which scene is Aiden's flashback, it's the last Aimily scene 3x03. I hope you like this, keep reviewing :)**

Aiden's POV

It's been a month since my mum died. My mother was so special to me, I remember she was so depressed after my father and my sister were gone and all I've ever wanted for her ever since those days it's for her to be happy. And I feel like I kinda failed, I mean she can't be happy now, she can't even be. And then there's the fact that every memory of us from this past years are gone from my brain, that makes it a whole worse. It's been hard and I really miss her but I've had friends there for me. Nolan checks on me everyday and Niko, well she's been staying with me since the incident. Colleen is acting stranger than usual though, she's nowhere to be seen. I know she's just next door but she doesn't go out anymore, she doesn't visit, she didn't even attend our mother's funeral. Ever since I woke up from my coma I realized that she changed, a lot, she looks different, she acts different, but then again I hadn't seen her since she was eleven. My mind is still really confused, I haven't told anyone but I've had this dreams lately. The dreams usually involve me working as a bartender in some sort of night club, or me hitting and kicking and fighting, but I don't recognize anyone who's around me, never. But they look so real as if they had actually occurred. I don't know though, I don't know anything anymore. I'm taking things slowly, one day at the time.

"Hey you" I say as I catch Niko cooking something downstairs.

"You're up!" She turns around smiling. "I'm making scrambled eggs."

"Mmm, smells good" I step closer to her.

"I know." She says as she wraps her arms around my waist. She closes the space between us and kisses me softly. "How's your leg?" She asks once we part.

"Better, I think I'll be throwing those crutches away very soon." I answer.

"That's so good." She turns to her food again. "Nolan's coming after breakfast." She tells me.

"Okay." I answer and start start setting the table for both of us.

Breakfast ends up being worst than I expected, it smelled good but it definitely doesn't taste good. I obviously faked loving it because Niko's trying her best, but I miss my mum's cooking.

"Hey 007!" I hear the one and only person that can be this cheery in the mornings, Nolan. He enters the kitchen and acknowledges Niko with a nod "Hello Niko"

"Good morning Nolan." She answers simply.

I've noticed that Colleen and Nolan aren't very fond of her but I haven't asked why yet. He sits in the counter and the usual "How are you feeling?"

He's done this ever since my mum's incident, he comes in here early in the morning and asks me how I'm doing. I always start explaining him about how my leg is getting better but we both know he cares more about how I feel emotionally. I've told him I few things but it's still tough for me to talk about my mother.

"I'm breaking up with my crutches." I joke.

He laughs and says "That's good man." He pats my back.

"I'm gonna go get some stuff from my house," Niko speaks up and walks behind me. "I'll be back soon." She kisses my temple.

I turn around and give her a peck on the lips. "See ya"

My gaze goes back to Nolan and I catch him making a disgust face but he covers it with a smile quickly.

Once Niko is outside the house, I ask "You don't like her, do you?"

"What? Pff I adore her." He brushes it off.

"O'cmon Nolan, aren't we supposed to be buddies? Tell me the truth."

"I just don't loove her because things ended badly when you guys broke up, that's all." He answers. "And don't change subjects, how you holding up?"

"I'm fine, I'm fine." It's my turn to brush it off. "I actually wanted to ask you something's about my past, I've been thinking about that a lot lately."

"How come?" He says.

"Well I've been having these dreams, or at least I think they're dreams, about me in certain places that I don't remember but the look so real."

He face expressions tell me that he's interested in what I'm saying. "Dreams?"

"Yeah, like for example, there's one where I'm at a night club and I'm working as a bartender. It's confusing because they're usually fuzzy so I haven't been able to recognize anyone." I explain.

"Is it always the same dream? Does it ever change?" He asks.

"There's two of them. One, is the bartender one, and there other is a little different." I answer. "I'm always fighting with someone, but it's like, it's like we were trained because we are good at it."

"Do you recognize this someone?"

"No, its never the same person though. But this dreams, they don't feel..." I trace off trying to find the right words.

"They don't feel..." He says.

"Dreamlike." I look at him and I can see he still doesn't get it. "These dreams feel real, they feel so real. Do you think that they could be..."

"Real?" He adds. "You think your mind is remembering in some sort of way?"

I thinks about it for a minute. What if my mind is trying to tell me something? What if my mind is starting to remember? "Why not?" I answer.

A strange look forms in his face, I can't quite get if it's fear or concern. Why would it be fear? I'm going with concern, he must be concerned about this.

"So I wanted to ask you for help, I'm gonna tell you my dreams from now on and you'll tell me if I ever mentioned something like that to you or if you know it happened." I tell him.

"Yes of course, you tell me every single dream, okay?" Nolan says just as his phone rings.

I nod and motion him to answer his phone.

He does by saying "Hey, I'm at my friend's right now, can we talk later?"

He listens for a few seconds. "Okay, okay, fine." And with that he hungs up. "I have to go my work is calling, I'm sorry." He tells me.

"Nono, that's okay." I give him a reassuring smile. "Niko'll be back soon anyway"

"Yeah but if you need anything just call." He walks towards the door. "Don't forget to tell me everything about your dreams Bond!"

He leaves and I quickly head back to my room. I put on a sweatshirt and a pair of black sweatpants. Niko's not going to be back in a while so I'm gonna go try to walk on my own. I'm sick and tired of wearing crutches and every time she's gone I walk without them around the house, but I think it's time to go out. I walk down the stairs and then out the door and my leg hurts a little but I suck it up. I walk my way to the beach perfectly, then I continue and as my leg gets more and more comfortable I start slightly jogging. I stare at the ocean, I don't know if the old me liked the beach but I just feel so happy right now. Does it hurt? Yeah. Is the pain worth it? Yes, definitely. This place looks so familiar. Was it part of my gone memory?

_Flashback_

_I'm walking towards her in the beach. She's kneeled down staring at something, a journal or something like that. Her golden locks fall down her shoulders as she now stares at the ocean. I reach her, kneel down behind her and just as I'm about to talk, everything starts fading._

Colleen, it was Colleen. What the hell? Why did it fade away? Why won't my brain aloud me to remember more?

The beach...it was this one, it looks exactly the same. I would call Nolan and tell him about this but he's busy with his job right now.

Everything is so confusing, I can't understand how my mind can shut off some parts of my life and remember others. I don't remember Niko, or Nolan, or that friend of his Jack. I remember my best friend being Sam. The last girlfriend I remember having is Jessica. I remember leaving my home in Liverpool to find Colleen. And after that I was on my own, no friends, no family. But it's around that time that my memories stop and everything else is gone. It's hard not to remember because I feel, I feel like I'm not, I don't know who I am. Everyone knows who I am but myself. I don't know how to act with people because I don't know who they are, I don't know if I used to like them or not. I stare at the manor as I jog. I wanna talk to Colleen again, I like talking to her, but she's been avoiding all of my calls. I even went to the manor twice and she didn't open the door, but I know she's there because I caught her staring at the beach house from her balcony. I miss her, I miss talking to her and laughing with her. Nolan told me she's just going through a hard time with our mother's death, that I shouldn't worry, but I can't do that. There's something about her that makes me wanna help her, I don't want her to go through this alone, I wanna be there for her. I can't help but worry. It's normal for a brother to care about their family members, right? But she won't give me the time of the day.

My phone startles me as it starts ringing. I take a look at the screen and answer "Hey babe"

"Hi baby" Niko replies. "Look something came up and I have to take care of it. I'm not sure I'll be back for dinner."

"That's fine, you go do your things. I'll be here waiting for you."

"Okay thanks. Call me if you need anything or if your legs hurts or whatever." She says.

"I'll fine but thank you." I answer.

"Okay then, I love you." She waits for answer.

It comes out so naturally out of her mouth, I love you. But that's just not me, at least not yet. I'm taking things slowly and I like it that way.

"Bye, see ya soon" I say sweetly and hung up.

* * *

I return to the beach house, get a quick cold shower and change clothes. I'm so bored of staying home all day. Maybe I should get a job? But I don't wanna work as a waiter or a receptionist or something like that. I don't know, I just have this feeling that I used to be a more physical person. I actually like jogging and running. Maybe I worked out a lot or I trained for something, that'd explain my dream. I turn the TV on and throw myself in the bed. My days lately have pretty much involved hanging out with Niko, watching TV, walking around the house, reading the newspaper and watching more TV. I have found some job ideas but I can't find the right one. I should ask Nolan for help, or maybe not, he's been al about me since my mum died and he might be exhausted. I grab the newspaper from the nightstand and start searching for jobs. Waiter at a local café, officer, supervisor, firefighter, chef, restaurant general manager, builder, clown (wtf), dog groomer, housekeeper, butcher, executive director of crap, crap and more crap. Nothing interesting, I mean clown, really? I keep looking through the page until something finally catches my attention, military recruitment. That sounds dangerous but I kinda like it. It's physical, proactive and incredibly important. I know it's a big thing and I'm just considering the option. Pros are; it includes a lot of physical activity, I can help the society and it's a job. Cons are; it's dangerous, hard working and incredibly strict. But what can I loose? I don't remember anything or anyone, my mum's gone, my past is gone, Colleen is practically out of the picture. This is stupid, how can I even consider this? Should I consider this? It's a full time job meaning it's going to be hard and long and lonely. And I'll get to protect the country, protect my family, protect Colleen. Mmm I may have to think about it more though, it's a big decision. I'll talk about it later with Nolan and Niko, for now I'm just going to cut out the advertisement. My mum would be proud though, she always dreamed of me working in the military forces when I grew up. I still have to take care of her stuff, I gotta sell her house, get all her things here and distribute them with Colleen, pay for her funeral arrangements, and there are many other sad things that have to be done. She only brought two suitcases to the Hamptons, everything else is in Liverpool. Maybe I'm gonna have to travel, I'll have to go back there eventually anyway. If only Colleen wasn't acting so weird, I would ask her to go with me. I'll start looking for flights today, I should leave next week or i two weeks. I'm going to call my doctor to see if I'm ready to travel and all but I'm positive that this trip is the best way to get everything done quickly. So that's what I do all day; I search for jobs and cheap tickets to England.

**I know it's short, sorry. I hope you liked it and please review!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Hello! So I know some of you are getting really sick of Niko but relax things will soon turn out how they're supposed to. Please keep reviewing!**

Emily/Amanda's POV same day

"Where were you?!" I shout at Nolan as he enters the manor.

I called him a few minutes ago and he said he was with a friend, for what I know he has no friends.

"With Aiden!" He answers startled. Oh that friend, I think. "What's goin' on?"

"Niko" I take my phone out of my pocket and hand it to him. "While you were too busy with-" I stop to clear my throat. "him, Niko was at her house and she got a phone call."

He grabs my phone and plays the video from the cameras he placed at her house.

"What do you want?" She says as she answers her phone. "I told you not to contact me anymore...u huh, I know- I know I owe you money...okay I'll be here all day. Don't ever call me again." She hangs up.

"Can you trace that phone call?" I ask even though I know the answer.

"Yes but isn't it easier to wait and watch if he goes to her house?" He replies.

"Let's do both, okay?" I suggest. "You get that phone number and make that person talk, and I'll spy on Niko all day. I'm more than sure this person has something to do with Niko's 'mission'"

"Okay." He answers and I start backing away to get my stuff but he stops me. "Wait, there's something I need to tell you, it's important."

"What? What happened?" I start getting worried.

"It's about Aiden." He clear his throat and continues. "I, I think that maybe his memory is coming back to him."

"Why would you say that?" I ask sternly.

"He told me about this dreams he's been having of him working as a bartender and training and fighting." He explains.

I think about it for a few minutes. How can this be happening? Is this really happening? If his memory comes back my last chance at a relationship with him is over. This can't be happening, oh my god. I have to make sure this dreams are actually memories and I'm going to use Nolan for that.

"Nolan, you have to tell me everything, okay? If you have to insist on him, you do it."

"I will Ems, trust me." He smiles sympathetically. "I'll go now, I have a person to track down."

"Thanks" I tell him as he opens the door. He gives me a reassuring smile and leaves.

I go up to my room and change into my black sporty clothes in case I have to get more physical today. I search through my closet for my weapons bag, I grab my car key and my phone, and I'm ready to go. This is the first time I've gone out in a month, Nolan has been doing the groceries for me. Why have I been hiding? Well that's simple, I've been dealing with Harriet's death on my own because I'm weak and I couldn't stand lying to Aiden in his face in a moment like this. I know I'm being selfish, I know he needs me but I would just end up ruining everything. So I've been in here, mourning Harriet, mourning the life I could have had if Victoria hadn't done what she did, mourning the good and happy moments that I had with Aiden before everything changed.

I need to stop being so emotional, heartless Emily has to come back, that's the only way to get what I want. I get on my car and drive to Takeda's.

* * *

I parked near Takeda's neighborhood and walked my way to his house about four hours ago and nothing has happened. I've been hiding in her front yard and spying on her through my phone but she's there doing nothing at all. If it was an enemy coming to my house I would at least carry a gun but she hasn't grabbed any kind of weapon yet so this must be an ally of hers. I still need to know who that person is, I thought Nolan would be done with his part by now. And as if my thoughts had been heard my phone starts ringing.

"I was starting to think you bailed on me." I whisper as I press it to my ear.

"I'm sorry this guy is as stubborn as you." Nolan jokes. "Took me while to figure out how to make him spill but I finally did and he spoke."

"What did he say?" I ask.

"He's a drug dealer. They aren't working but she owes him money because he did her a favor." He answers.

"What favor?"

"She offered him money so he wouldn't tell anyone about their deal. What was their deal? I don't know he hung up on me. Do you want me to track him and take care of that?" He asks me.

"No, you've done enough. He's supposed to come here anyway, thanks Nolan." I reply.

"Anything for you and Bond." He stays silent for a few seconds, then speaks. "Ems is it me or the some of the cameras are being turned off."

"What?" I check my phone and three of the seven cameras we placed are in black. "It's not just you."

I hear a car pulling in and I look around to find a black car parked in front of Takeda's house.

This must be him. "He's here." I tell Nolan. Then out of nowhere every camera turns off. "What the hell?!" I whisper/ shout out.

"She knew we where watching her all along, she turned them off herself. Damn it!" Nolan shouts through the phone.

"Don't worry, I'll take care of it." I answer and hang up.

I sneak closer to the entrance still hiding behind the bushes. I watch as a man gets out of the car. He walks towards the door and as he gets closer I catch a glimpse of his face. I know this person, I've seen this face before...but where? Then my brain makes click and I remember who it is, he's the guy who sold Victoria the poison. Wait what is he doing here? Does, does Niko have anything to do with Aiden's incident?

The door opens before he even gets the chance to knock. Niko steps out, takes a stack of dollars out of her pocket and hands it to him. "Take that and don't come back. We never met, we never talked. Now go!" She says.

"Deal." He answers and turns around to leave.

Niko closes the door behind her and I follow the guy from my spot behind the trees and plants. He gets inside his car and I run out of my hiding place and storm inside of his car. I take out my gun and point it at his head.

"Remember me sunshine?" I say.

"Who the fuck are you? How did you find me?!" He shouts scared.

"That's not important, what's important here is that you tell me everything I wanna know." I answer.

"He won't say anything." I hear a familiar Australian voice behind me as I feel the end of a gun being pressed against my scalp. "Get out of the car" she orders me.

And well as you can imagine I don't obey. I turn around and kick her in the stomach. She falls back on the ground but quickly stands up and grab me by the hair. I growl at how hard she's pulling my hair until she throws me out of the car. Before I can do anything the car starts moving,and with the door open and everything, he leaves.

I stand up and grab one of Niko's leg bringing her down. I kick her in the stomach harshly and she grabs my feet bringing me down with her. She's on top of me now, kicking and punching. I roll us over and bring my hands to her neck to end this. I start pressing harder as she battles to free herself.

"What. Do. You. Want?" She manages to ask and then starts coughing.

"Oh don't act like you don't know, how are you involved with that guy?" I spit.

She hesitates before answering. "Okay, let-" she coughs. "let go."

I'm not stupid, she could attack me if I let go so I step on her chest to keep her down as I let go of her neck.

"Speak!" I shout.

"I owed him money." She says glaring at me.

"I know that, you owed him for his silence. What is that about?" I press harder.

She coughs and replies "I didn't buy anything from him, I made him sell something to someone else and keep quiet about that!"

Then everything falls into place. Niko-Niko's the man the drug dealer was talking about! The one who was to supposed to be gone, the one who threatened to kill him if he didn't sell Victoria TTX, the one who...saved Aiden's life. But why? After everything Aiden's done to her, why would she save him? Does she really love him that much?

"You're the one who did that?" I take my leg off her body. "He said it was a man."

"Well he lied because we had a deal." She states the obvious as she stands up. "Now you know the truth, happy?" She laughs sarcastically.

"Why were you hiding it? Why didn't you tell Aiden?" I ask. "You'd be his hero."

"Because of that! Because I was afraid that he'd hang out with me because he felt like he owed me something!" She shouts at me. "I just wanted to start over."

"How come you never visited him before he woke up?" I ask.

"That's what you think that happened." She points at me. "I was there every time you guys left, till that one time you caught me. That's why I stopped hiding, because I knew you would search for that person every single day."

"You were the one who had his ring." I say as everything sinks in. Niko saved his life and she didn't tell him because she didn't want him to feel obligated to like her? It pains me to say this but Niko's being a better person to Aiden than I am. "Why didn't you kill Victoria instead of giving her a slower poison?"

"Because it seemed fair, he killed my father so he deserved something back, but I didn't know it would be like this. I feel bad about that every single day but I made that choice and I can't take it back." She answers.

"It's fine, you saved him anyways." I point out and turn around to leave.

"Wait! Emily wait, please!" She grabs my arm to stop me. I turn around and she continues. "Don't tell him, I'll tell him when I think it's time I swear."

"As long as you keep my secret, I'll keeps yours." I say. I look for my gun that went flying through the floor when she tossed me out of the car, pick it up and start walking away.

* * *

"Ems, what the hell happened?!" Nolan says as he enters the manor. "Your face, your arms!" He says as he takes in my appearance.

My arms are covered in bruises and face has a few cuts from the fight. I guess even though I was Takeda's favorite, fighting with his own blood isn't an easy thing to do. My back hurts too from all the tossing and falling. I know for sure that I don't look okay but I hate admitting it, another thing Takeda taught me 'never show weakness'.

"I'm fine, but a lot happened." I motion him to follow me as I walk towards the living room.

"What? All I know is that she disconnected all the cameras and I couldn't see anything after that." He complains as he follows.

I sit down on the couch, which is the only furniture I've got in this room since I gave all Grayson's things to charity. I Was supposed to redecorate a while ago but with Harriet's death and so much thinking I just wasn't feeling it. Nolan sits beside me and looks at me with a waiting look on his face. I stare at him blankly for a few seconds before loosing it. I start sobbing and he bring his hand to my back to rub it.

"She- she deserves him, Nolan" I between sobs. "She deserves him more than I do"

Nolan doesn't need me to tell him who, he knows who I'm talking about all too well. "Why are you saying this, Ems?" He asks softly.

"She saved him, she saved his life." I bring my hands to my eyes to hide from the world. "She's the reason he's alive and I'm just a little liar in this whole thing!"

"Ems, I don't know what happened and I'm not going to pressure you to tell me, but I do know one thing for sure and that's that you'll always be his one and only. Everyone knows you belong together." He brings me close and hugs me with one arm.

That's what Aiden told me once, I can't but remember that beautiful memory.

_Flashback_

_"You and I we've called it quits so many times," He says as he looks at me in the eyes and I can't help but grin slightly, he's the only one that has that effect on me. "but we haven't been able to make that state really, have we?"_

_I look down awkwardly, another one of his effects, but he makes me raise my head by penetrating those deep ocean eyes on me. "And that's because we fit, we belong together."_

_I blink just to make sure I'm not dreaming, but when my eyes open he's still there, starting at me with so much love. Oh god I love the way he looks at me, the way he touches me, the way he talks to me, just the way he loves me. I run my fingers through his hair and slide my hand through it landing on his cheek. He move his head in my hand and kisses it._

_"I know." I finally answer as I step closer._

_He brings his face closer and I shut the space between us taking his lips in mine. It feels so safe, it feels so good, it feel so right._

"What if I'm not though? What if I'm not the only one?" I tell Nolan after having my own little dream. "What if we don't belong together?"

"You're wrong, you'll see." He kisses my temple just like Aiden used to. "Are you gonna tell me what happened?"

I nod as I whip a tear off my face. "So it all started when the guy got there..." I start.

After a couple of minutes I finish telling him everything. Then we stay like that all night, sitting and thinking, and eventually, we fall sleep.

**I hope you liked it and please review! Oh and also tell me if you're liking the flashbacks or if you wanna suggest one, that would be awesome :)**


	10. Chapter 10

**Hello! So if you aren't able to recognize what scene I'm talking about in Aiden's dream, it's when Aiden kills that Dimitri guy. This chapter is short because I wanted the next scenes to be told by Emily/Amanda. Please REVIEW, your reviews help me write. What if somethings are coming to an end? Like for example Aiden's lost memories...who knows? Keep reading y'all!**

Aiden's POV

I wake up with a jolt breathing heavily. I was dreaming, again, but this dream was different.

"Babe," Someone says and touches my arm. I move away scared but then I realize it's just Niko. "you okay?"

I calm myself and then answer "I'm fine I was dreaming, go back to sleep."

"You sure?" She opens her sleepy eyes slightly.

"Yeah" I reply softly.

She does as I tell her and after a few minutes falls asleep again. Once I'm sure her breathing is steady and she's not awake, I slowly get out of the bed. I just can't go back to sleep yet, I'm too shocked. I put on a pair of sweatpants and go downstairs. I grab a glass of water and go out in the porch.

The sound of the ocean seems to really calm me a bit and that salty wind hits me perfectly. Then I notice the lights of the manor are still on and when I look up at Colleen's balcony, she's there staring down at the beach house. There's something there that looks familiar, the scene is as if I've seen it before. Maybe in a dream?

_Flashback_

_She stands there, looking down at the beach house from her balcony, her brunette hair flying with the cold wind. But that doesn't stop her, she keeps staring, almost like she was spying on us. Us? I look beside me to find a too familiar blonde. We're both in the porch of the beach house, side by side, having a staring battle with Victoria._

Victoria? This is the first time I've put a name to the faces in my dreams and flashbacks. But who is Victoria? What does she have to do with me? Why is she in my mind?

I take out my phone from my pants and look at the time. It 2am in the morning, why is Colleen still awake?

When she notices me, she turns around and goes back inside her room. I still don't get what's going on with her, is she mad at me? And if she is, what did I do?

I decide to call Nolan since he told me to tell him about my dreams right away, and because I just can't go back to sleep after a dream like that.

"Hello?" I hear a sleepy Nolan answer on the other side of the line.

"Hey, sorry for calling so late or early, whatever." I say.

"It's fine, is everything okay there?" He asks still sleepy.

"Uh yeah, I just, I had another dream and some sort of flashback I guess." I answer.

"Another one?" He sounds more alert now. "Tell me about it."

I take a deep breath and prepare to myself to tell him my nightmare. "Well okay, so uhm, I was- I had..." I stumble through my words. "Please tell me the true or not, no matter how bad it is."

"You can trust me buddy" he reassures me.

"Okay so, I was pointing a- a gun at this guy and Colleen was holding a gun too. They both spoke but I couldn't hear anything, I don't know why. I remember reading her lips as she said don't do it or something like that. Then he said something but I couldn't read his lips. That seemed to upset me a lot beca- because I," I swallow hard. "I shot him."

He stays silent for a few seconds before answering. "I don't know Aiden, I wasn't there."

"You think Colleen knows? She hasn't answered my calls and texts since- that day, how am I supposed to ask her?" I say.

"I'll ask her, don't worry. Have you had any other dreams?" He asks.

"I had this sort of flashback." I tell him. "There was this old brunette woman, staring at the beach house from the manor's balcony. And I recognized her, I mean I don't remember who she is but I remember her name."

"What is it?" He asks me.

And I answer "Victoria"

"Oh god" I hear a female voice say near him.

"Who's that? Are you alone?"

"Oh yeah, it's just a TV show I was watching" he brushes it off. "Are you sure her name is Victoria? Because I don't know anyone with such name."

"Really? I just feel so strongly sure about this, it's her name. And can I ask one more thing?" I tell him.

"Of course, what is it?" He replies.

"I don't remember the man I was but you do. Nolan, do you think I was capable of doing such thing as killing a man?"

"Aiden, we don't know if it's real or not, okay? Don't worry 007 you were a great person."

I take a deep breath and stay silent as I try to let his words comfort me. What if I did kill the man? What if I wasn't such a great person?

"Well thank you for telling me everything, I'll make sure to ask Colleen." He breaks the silence.

"Do you think my memory is coming back?" I ask him out of nowhere.

"Uh I don't know, you should ask a professional that question." He answers.

"Yeah I'm being stupid. How could my memory possibly just cone back, right?" I say.

"I'm not saying it's not possible, it has happened to many patients before. I'm just not sure if that your case, we could get professional help though." He tells me.

"Yeah, maybes that's the best option right now. Okay well, I'll tell you if I get another of this weird dreams. You should go to sleep now."

"K then, goodnight Aiden" he answers and hangs up.

It's late I'm going back to sleep too, I'll deal with everything tomorrow.

* * *

I wake up at 7am this time from another dream. As a child I loved dreaming and I loved those rare time when I had two or more dreams a night, but this time is different, this time I'm getting sick of dreaming that much. The dreams are getting weirder and weirder each time. I had a total of three dreams counting the one where I shot that poor guy. The second one was about Colleen and I, we were just running around a maze as some dogs chased us. And in the third one I was leaving this weird Japanese household with nothing but a backpack. I didn't live there otherwise I would have had more stuff with me, maybe I was visiting?

I look beside me to find the other side of the bed empty. Where's Niko? Where did she go?

"I'm right here." I hear her voice coming from the bathroom.

"Why are you up so early?" I ask as I hop off the bed and start walking her way.

"Wait Aiden, don't come in!" She says as she hears my moving.

"Are you okay?" I start to get worried. Why wouldn't she let me see her?

"Just, uhm, promise me you won't freak out?" She replies.

I don't answer, I just continue my way to the bathroom. "What's goin-" I get cut off by what I see when I enter. She's in her underwear and that allows me to see all the bumps and bruises she's got all over her body.

I look at her with a what-the-hell-happened face and she speaks up again "I got in a fight with an old friend and I fell down the stairs."

"What kind of friends do you have? The ninja turtles?" I joke.

She laughs and says "It's not as bad as it looks."

"Oh don't start with the whole tough act!" I say. "I know it too well, I did it all through my recovery."

"Oh really?" She raises an eyebrow and smirks. "You're a tough guy, huh? Well I am too, so I'm fine I swear. I'll take some pain killers just for you."

"You better" I step closer to her and slowly and carefully wrap my arms around her waist. "Does this hurt?"

She shakes her head and rests it on my chest. I hug her closer and as she puts her head on my shoulder her hair changes, instantly, it flashes to blond and then back at brunette. Then I get this weird feeling, like confusion, I don't know like my mind is trying to tell me something. What the hell?

_Flashback_

_"I'm too late?" I say softly as I enter the beach house so I don't startle her._

_She notices me from her spot in the couch. She looks so fragile, she's got her shoulders in, her head down, a crooked back, actually her whole body posture indicates weakness. I can't stand to see her like this, I can't watch her suffer._

_"If you came here to say I told you so, you can leave." She says as she stands up._

_"I didn't come here for that." I take a few steps forward. "Come here" I tell her and extend my hand towards her._

_"No" her voice comes weak as she takes a step backwards._

_"Come here" I try again but I get a no for an answer and she keeps getting away from me. I'm not gonna stop, we both know she needs me right now. "Come" I grab her arm tight but making sure it doesn't hurt her._

_"No!" She replies stubbornly and starts hitting me with her free hand._

_That doesn't stop me either. "C'mon, come here" I continue to talk softly as she tries to fight me._

_"No, no, n-" She says before exploding into a bunch of sobs and finally giving in._

_I wrap one hand around her back and place the other one in the back of her head to keep her steady. She starts crying and wraps one arm around my neck. She places her other hand around my shoulder and rests her head on it as well. The act can't last forever between us, we both know she needs comfort._

_"Shhh, it's okay." I sooth her as we hold on tight. "It's okay." I add._

_She's letting it all out and I'm going to be right here to give her shelter, if it takes minutes, if it takes hours, I don't care. I kiss her head tenderly to reassure her that without any words needed._

"Earth calling Aiden Mathis?" I hear Niko's voice as she brings me out of that strange state I was in. "Are you even listening?"

"I..." I look around unsure of what to say. "Niko, remember those dreams I told you about?"

"Uh yeah, why?" She asks.

"Well I've more of those lately, they're different ones but they all seem so-" I search for the right word to describe them. "they seem so real."

"What do mean, baby?" She grabs my hand.

"Never mind, it's not relevant." I brush it off. "I'm still waiting on you to take those pills." I say changing the subject.

"Okay dad!" She jokes. "I'll go get dressed and then I'll take 'em."

She goes back into the room and I follow after her. My head feels so heavy and it hurts, maybe I'll take some pain killers too.

"Want me to make breakfast? I think we've got eg-" I stop as my vision get a little blurry and my feet feel unsteady.

"Aiden?" She notices my struggle to focus. "You feeling okay?"

I suddenly loose all power to stay in two feet and fall backwards. I hear a loud thump and Niko's voice as if she was miles away. I can't see anything now, it all faded into oblivion. I feel myself drown into this weird dream state and everything goes black. But my body's still awake, I can feel myself alive, I can hear my breathing. What the fuck is happening to me? Where am I? What is this? Am I- am I alive?

**Sooo I hope you liked it and the continuation will be posted soon don't worry. Please review :)**


	11. Chapter 11

**Hello! So next chapter may be a little confusing at first because it's going to be like a big flashback (kinda like 2x08), but I felt like it's necessary because you guys have waited too long for some Aimily action. And it's probably gonna be written in two POV. Oh guys I know this is getting a little old but please review, I feel like I'm doing a bad work here. **

Emily/Amanda's POV

"We came as fast as we could, what's wrong?" I say as Nolan and I enter the master bedroom of the beach house. Niko called Nolan while we were eating breakfast telling him to get to the beach house asap. I didn't hear her but Nolan says her voice sounded deadly serious.

I don't see her at first but then I notice she's on the floor, in only her underwear, her whole body is covered in bruises. Maybe I went a little too hard on her? No, she doesn't need my compassion, she's got Aiden for that. Aiden, where is him anyway? Then I notice there's something under her shield.

"I don't know what happened, I swear. He was, he just-" She says as she turns around. Her eyes are red and her face is puffy.

That's when I notice him, Aiden, he's under her lying motionless. It feels like somebody just kicked me in the stomach as hard as they could. He's not moving, he's not moving, oh my god! "What the fuck did you do?!" I shout as I take a few steps towards and throw myself beside him.

"I didn't do anything! He just- he fainted out of nowhere!" She tells me as she puts her hands on his body.

"Don't touch him! Get out!" I yell at her as my hands start shaking with disgust and anger.

"It wasn't me! He seemed a little unsteady for a second and then he was on the floor! I didn't do anything!" She defends herself.

"Shut up and get the hell out!" I scream at her louder this time.

"Okay Niko, why don't you go get dressed?" Nolan steps in.

She looks angrily between me and Aiden before standing up, grabbing some piece of cloth from the bed and storming of to the bathroom.

As soon as she slams the door shut, Nolan runs to my side and leans in putting his ear to Aiden's mouth. "He's breathing."

I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding and ask weakly "Can you call the ambulance?"

He nods, takes out his phone and dials.

"Don't do this to me again, Aiden." I say softly as a tear rolls down my face. "Do not do this, you understand me? Not again, not ever." I tell him as tears drop silently from my eyes.

_Flashback _

_I walk up the stairs of the porch and walk into my house. I couldn't wai to get here I needed to find Aide and enjoy such a moment like this with him. My father, David Clarke, is finally free. All that bullshit he was charged on has been cleared. I did it, I cleaned my father's name but I couldn't have done it without help. And trust me I've been waiting all day to come celebrate with my allly, my love. He's done so much for me, I'll never be able to repay him. I love him so much and it's weird because I'm not like that, I'm not someone to show affection, but He breaks through my walls anyways. So yeah I'm so happy and proud and not my usual self right now. _

_I smile as soon as I spot him, he has his back towards me as he sits on the couch in front of the chimney. "Hey" I say. "Did you hear the news?" I walk towards him and take my jacket off. "It happened, they cleared him."_

_Weirdly he doesn't answer so I stand beside the couch and take a look at him from there. "Aiden, you okay?" No reply. I take a few more steps to get a better angle, but one I see his face my heart stops. "Aiden?"_

_His face is pale and his mouth and eyes are open but motionless. He's rigid like a stone. Oh god, oh god._

_"Aiden, are you okay?" My voice comes weaker this time. I stand in front of him, lean in and place my han on his cheek. His skin is cold as ice and rough as a rock. I'm not going to believe what my brain is telling me, I can't believe it. "No" I say almost in a whisper. "Aiden wake up." I grab his shirt and start shaking him hoping that this is all a joke and he'll open his eyes. "Aiden, wake up!"_

_He isn't waking up and I'm running out of breath as if I suddenly forgot how to. I get up from my spot and place my legs beside Aiden's sides so I'm on top of him. I grab the back of his neck otherwise his head falls back, it's numb, life- life- lifeless. _

_"No, no, no, no, no." I say between sobs. "Aiden wake up!" I shout this time. Nothing changes. _

_This is it? After everything we've gone through? This is fucking it?! H-He is dead, dead. I feel like someone just sticked their hand through my body and ripped out my heart. This can't be happening, this isn't fair, this isn't fair! "No, no, no!" I start crying. I cry harder than I've ever cried. "NOO!" I cry out. "NOOO!" I shout with all my heart. Actually I don't longer have one, Victoria just took it away from me. I know it was her, I'm not even going to doubt it. I don't care if I loose my voice like this, I don't care about anything anymore. The person I cared about the most was killed and is lying under me lifeless. There's just no point at stopping so I keep screaming and crying and shouting the same word over and over again. He's gone, my Aiden is gone._

* * *

"So basically he just fainted or passed out which is the loss of consciousness and muscle strength, characterized by a fast onset, short duration, and spontaneous recovery. It is due to a decrease in blood flow to the entire brain usually from low blood pressure. There are a variety of causes, such us fear, emotional trauma, severe pain, a sudden drop in blood pressure, low blood sugar due to diabetes or from going too long without eating, dehydration, diseases, heart problems, etc. Some causes have early symptoms before the loss of consciousness occurs. These symptoms may include light headedness, sweating, pale skin, blurred vision, nausea, vomiting, among others." Dr. Hunt explains us. We're lucky we got him again. "But as I told you guys before, he went through surgery twice a couple of months ago so that, adding some stress or something like that, may be the cause of this scenario. We run some tests and we did not find anything wrong with his blood pressure or his blood sugar or anything."

"But he's not waking up, there must be something wrong!" Niko replies at him angrily.

"Some patients take longer than others Ms. Takeda. We did everything we can at a stage like this." He defends himself.

"Niko, why don't you go get lost and let us speak with Dr. Hunt in peace?" Nolan snaps at her.

"Oh why don't you go, pony boy?" She snaps back.

And like that they start their own little fight. I motion Dr. Hunt to follow me and leave those two alone for a second.

"Sorry about that. So Aiden can go home as soon as he wakes up?" I ask.

"Well I'll have to do a little check out but then he's free to go." He smiles sympathetically at me.

"Okay, thank you for everything Dr. Hunt." I say.

He nods his head, smiles at me one more time and leaves through the halls of this god damn hospital.

I'm more than sick of coming here, it always means bad news. We got here like 4 hours ago and Aiden still hasn't woken up. But everything's okay with him so maybe he's just sleeping, or dreaming, or whatever he's doing.

"Niko's a bitch." Nolan says as he comes from behind me.

"Took you a while to figure it out." I joke as I turn around.

"He's been out for hours and I'm getting sick of having to stand that repulsive woman!" He complains and puts an arm around my shoulders. He starts walking and practically dragging me with him towards Aiden's hall. "You did lEave pretty bad marks on her body, so I'm happy about that."

"Have you seen my face? She gave me some pretty bad bruises too." I point out.

"Yeah but you look beautiful, she on the other hand looks like...stoned Lindsay Lohan tbh." He says in that mean girls tone of his.

I laugh at how Nolan that comment was. "Why thank you for the compliment, but I think anyone cna look better than stoned Lindsay Lohan."

He laughs as we make our way to Aiden's room. But when he opens the door there's no one inside. Where's Aiden?

My phone vibrates and I find a text message from Niko.

'I tried to stop him but he ignored me and got in a cab.' It says.

'Did he tell you were he's going?' I text back.

'He said he was going to the beach house to get his stuff out, that's all.' She answers.

'Wait for us in the parking lots, Nolan will drive us.' I put my phone and keep going.

"He's heading to the beach house" I tell Nolan as I start walking away.

"Wait," Nolan follows me. "Who?"

"Aiden!" I answer.

"What? He's up and awake?"

"Yeah and he left" I reply.

"Why would he leave without telling us?"

I think about it for a second. "I have no idea."

* * *

We finally get to the beach house after the longest drive I've ever taken. Nolan drove as fast as he could actually, but I'm just too nervous. I don't get why he would just walk out alone and then tell Niko that he's leaving the beach house. I get off the car, Niko and Nolan following right at my toes, and make my way to the house.

I open the door and hear noise coming from upstairs. We all go up the stairs and into the master bedroom. There he is, with a pile of clothes between his hands and a big bag on top of the bed.

"Aiden, what are you doing?" Niko speaks as she takes a step towards him.

He ignores her and keep fiddling through his clothes and shoes. He looks angry, but with who? What's going on with him?

"You can't just disappear like that after passing out for like 5 hours." I try to grab his attention. "We care about your health Aiden." This is the first time I've talked to him in like a month.

"Colleen's right man, you had us worried sick." Nolan adds.

That makes him stop and let go of whatever he was packing. "Colleen?" He says and then laughs sarcastically.

"What?" Nolan replies.

"You said Colleen," He turns to look at him. "you said Colleen you coward!"

"Yeah because Colleen sai-"

"There's no fucking Colleen and I know it!" He shouts. "I remember, I remember everything!"

"What? How?" Nolan thinks out loud.

"I don't know how but I remembered during those five hours. How could you guys lie to me like that? You two-" He points at Niko and Nolan. "I can imagine, but you..." He looks at me for the first time.

His deep ocean blue eyes are now darker than ever and I could see the anger in them from miles away. Oh god. Why is this happening?

"How could you?! I've all the things I've been through about Colleen?!" He takes at step forward furiously. "How could you Emily? Or is it Amanda? Or whatever you wanna be called now!"

"Aiden I was just, I wanted-" I try to defend myself.

"No!" He cuts me off. "You shouldn't have lied to me and that's all!"

"I did it for you! I didn't wanna be that person for you! Because I was selfish and careless and I got this chance to be different, for you!"

"No, you don't get to act like the victim here." He snaps at me. "You did it for yourself, because you're self-centered and you wanted to feel good about yourself. You've never cared of anyone but yourself!"

"That's enough, Aiden." Nolan steps in.

"It's enough?" He changes his gaze towards him. "You can tell when it's enough now, but couldn't tell when it was enough of lies before?"

"Aiden I'm sorry." Nolan says.

"What? You think that's going to fix it? You think that's goin' to make me feel less stupid? Because you guys treated me like I'm stupid! You took advantage of my condition and made a fool of me."

"Leave them out of this, it was my idea! This is on me." I admit.

He takes a few deep breaths before answering "I trusted you with my life Amanda, but you betrayed me. So yeah, this one's in fact on you."

I want to say something but I don't know what. He's right, he's so right, I betrayed him. I stare at him and he stares back at me for a few seconds before shaking his head and turning back to his bag. He zips it and hangs it over his shoulder.

"Where are you going to stay?" Niko breaks the silence.

He turns around and replies "As far away as I can."

With that said, he pushes past me and leaves the room. I stay there, in my spot, I don't move. I don't speak, I can't say anything, I don't want to. I ruined it all and now I'm paying back. Oh God, why are you doing this to me? The one person that matters most to me hates me now. But he's right about everything, I did lie to him, I lied to the one person who has dedicated his life to me. I'm still selfish, I'm still a bad person. As hard as I try I will never be better, maybe I'm just meant to be another mistake in this world. I guess the truth always comes out in the end, right? He hates me and it's my fault, as always, it's my fault.

**I hope you likes this chapter and I also hope you don't get confused by the next one, which you will love trust me. Please reeevviieewwww :)**


	12. Chapter 12

**Hi! Sooorry for the wait, I just- I have a life to attend to, even though it's as boring as hell, I have to. I've also been having personal problems and since I've got no one to help me, I just needed some time for myself. To the point, as I promised this chapter is kind of like 2x08 (flashback style). Let me explain a bit why I'm doing this, I feel like you guys have waited way too much for some Aimily action but they still have to figure things out, I don't like those stories were they're straight up together so yeah. But since you guys have remained loyal to my fanfic I'm writing this sort of romantic and sexy chapter. It's placed back when they were in Japan and they're already dating, kinda after that flashback I wrote, the one where Emily tells him she's a virgin. Oh and it's going to be written in both Emily's and then Aiden's POV. Next chapter will be right after last chapter, hopefully you don't get so lost. If you like it, review :)**

Emily/Amanda's POV

"I'm so tired, Takeda is going to end up killing us with all this training!" I say as I walk with Aiden by my side. We're heading to his room after a long day of training. Takeda made us train from 6 o'clock in the morning to 9pm.

"Yeah well it's worth it, right?" He answers. "Because of this you'll get to revenge your father's death and clean his name."

I think about it for a second and reply. "You're missing something."

"You'll make Takeda proud?" He tries to guess it.

"Nope"

"You'll see your house again?"

"No"

"You'll...I don't know" He gives up.

"It's worth it because I met you here, dumbass" I tell him.

I'm not like this usually, so openly about my feelings, but he has this effects on me and opening up is one of them.

"Oh, I'm glad I met you too" He answers, wraps an arm around my waist and kisses my temple.

I like it when he hugs me, it makes me feel comfortable and safe.

We keep walking, then Aiden opens the door to his room and we enter.

He lets go and speaks "I'm taking a shower." He takes off his shirt and his pants in a flash. He stands there in only boxers to and I can't help but stare. His stomach completely toned probably from all the training and his muscles are showing everywhere. "You like the view?" He says and smirks.

"I-" I clear my throat nervously. "I wasn't looking." I feel my cheeks heat up. Why does he have to have this effects on me?

"Oh okay, you tell yourself that." He laughs. "Stay here if you want, I'll be out in a minute." He goes into the bathroom.

He looks so sexy like that. I've never felt this way before, he's making me feel things in a weird way. I'm constantly thinking about him, about us kissing, about us touching, but then I remember that I'm still a virgin and that stops all my daydreams. I told him two or three days ago that I was a virgin and he took it so well, he was happy and sweet but I'm still scared. I mean I want to I swear I want to, but I can't help but think about the fact that he has slept with someone before and I might not be as good at it as that person was. What if I'm terrible and he doesn't want me anymore? What if he likes it so much that it becomes one of those 'all about sex relationships'?

I can't believe I'm being so girly right now. I have to have courage, I'm a strong and careless woman. I can do this, it's easy, I can do it. I can actually do it right now. Why not? I start taking my clothes off as I walk towards the bathroom.

I enter the bathroom fully unclothed and he's in the shower, his back towards me. Okay this is it, I can do this. I take a deep breath before stepping inside the shower. He doesn't seem to notice me probably because the water is running and he couldn't hear me, so I wrap my arms around his waist from behind and place my hands on his abs. I feel him tense and I start running my hands up and down his stomach to calm him. I know exactly why he's acting this way, we've never showered together and he's not sure what to do because he wants to give me time and he doesn't want to rush things.

"It's okay" I whisper in his ear making sure that my lips touch his skin. My hands start wandering downwards and I can't stop, it's feel good.

He growls and finally turns around. He grabs my sides tightly, brings me closer to him and presses his mouth again mine. He kisses me rather harsh and I catch up immediately. I slide my tongue inside his mouth and we fit instantly. We until we both run out of breath and stop.

"I...want...you" I say between breaths and push my lips against his once again.

He kisses back and I bring him even closer, our wet naked bodies touching. I feel butterflies in my stomach as I feel his groin against my skin. This might seem like a rush but I really want him, he's the one, I can feel it. He grabs my right leg and wraps it around his side. He rubs it as I start kissing down his neck. I bite hard and lick the swollen flesh making him growl, lift my head and bring his mouth to mine.

Everything's perfect, this feels right, until he suddenly pulls away. He lets go of my leg and my lips and just backs up.

"I'm sorry" He says after catching his breath. "I just- you want me? What's that supposed to mean?"

What? Where's this coming from? Why did he stop? "You know what it means. Are you seriously gonna make me say it?" I reply.

"I think I know what you meant, but Amanda are you sure? I thought you were waiting till you got married or something."

"What? No, I never said that." I answer trying to forget about the fact that we're both naked. "I'm not waiting, I told you I just hadn't met the right person."

"Amanda I don't wanna rush you into anything. Are you sure you're ready? I mean there has to be a reason why you wouldn't have done...it before."

"I'm telling you the truth Aiden! I've never thought about waiting till I got married because that's most likely never gonna happen in a life like mine but I have been waiting to find the right guy, the one and only you know." I feel myself blushing. "I know we've been together for a while and I haven't done anything because I was scared!"

"Of what?" He asks softly.

I look down ashamed as I answer "Not being good enough."

He puts his fingers under my chin and lifts my head making me look at him. "Why would you be scared of that?"

"Because y-you have slept with other women before and what if I'm not like them? What if I suck at it? What if they're a million times better than I am? My body and my experiences are not like theirs, Aiden!"

"What are you talking about? You think I care about those chicks? You think I compare you to them? You're gorgeous and you shouldn't be comparing yourself to other girls!" He replies angrily.

"I'm sorry but I do! I compare myself because I'm scared that I won't be enough for you! I mean look at yourself, you've probably slept with hundreds!" Oh my god, I can't believe I said that. I didn't want to, I was nervous and it just came out.

"How many girls do you think I've slept with?" He spits back.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean that, I meant to say that with that body- whatever!"

"Just say what you need to say Amanda" He says.

"I'm guess I'm kinda scared but I am ready, you are the one I want to have sex with for the first time Aiden, you are the one!"

I stare at him as I calm myself down. I don't even get why we're fighting. This was going great, I was actually enjoying it, but this had to happen.

* * *

Aiden's POV

Even though she just called me a man whore, I know and hope that's not what she meant. She literally just told me she wants me to be her first and she wants it now, but I can't. I can't let this special moment for her be so simple and ordinary, it should be a big thing. Why not? I could prepare something cute and girly for her, but I just need to get out of here to do that. She's probably wondering what I'm thinking right now, I better answer.

"I can't do this, I just can't..." I say as I walk past her and step out of the shower. I grab a towel, wrap it around my waist and exit the bathroom.

I don't wanna leave her there, sad and lonely, thinking I'm mad at her, but I have to otherwise my plan won't work. I need her to believe I'm mad at her so she won't be around while I prepare her surprise, which I still don't know what's going to be.

"Aiden wait!" I hear her from behind. I don't turn around or else I'll loose the act to those beautiful brown eyes. "Aiden, I'm sorry." She says softly as she puts her hand on my shoulder. "I didn't mean to say that, I swear, I-"

"I think you should leave." I cut her off. As bad as it feels to do this to her, I need her out.

She stays silent for a few seconds before answering "Okay, I'll go." I hear her fiddling with her scattered clothes and in less than minute she's dressed. "I'm sorry..." She whispers after walking out the door.

I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. Okay, I need to get my plan started. Since it's like 10pm tight now, it will have to be tomorrow. I just hope she doesn't get too upset tonight. I know exactly where I'll take her to have some more privacy than this rooms. I know how much women love red roses so I'll go by some tomorrow morning to the small village near us. I have a lot to do in little time but I'll do anything for her. I grab my phone from my nightstand and dial Ava. She's friends with Amanda and me and I need some girl help here.

"Hello?" She answers her phone.

"Ava, I'm gonna need you to help me with a mission." I tell her.

"Who did you kill and why?"

"No one, it's a different kind of mission."

"Okay, what would that different kind of mission be..?" She asks me.

"Girl advice, I guess?" Oh god, that sounded so bad. "I mean, I need your woman point of view about something"

"You're starting to scare me, you are the most masculine of all the friends I've made here." She laughs.

"Thank you, but seriously I need you."

"Okay, spill it." She says simply.

"I want to make something for Amanda." I say.

"Like...what? C'mon spill it once and for all!"

"She's a virgin and it's going to be our first time doing it." I answer rapidly.

"Oh" She laughs. "Really? That's so sweet, oh my god!"

"Yeah and I need your help, I want this to be perfect."

"I'm in!" She says.

"Thanks Ava, can you not go to training tomorrow?" I ask her.

"Sure, Takeda's bitting the hell out of us anyway, I'll happily skip the day." She replies.

"Okay then thanks again, see you tomorrow."

"See ya!" She answers like a typical American.

Tomorrow is going to be be perfect, Amanda will love it.

* * *

Amanda's POV

Things have been different today. Aiden and Ava skipped training but I saw them at breakfast together. I know they're friends but he usually sits with me. Is he still mad about yesterday? Why wouldn't he be, I practically called him a whore. At least training was hard so I took it all out and Takeda still thinks I'm the best. My life has become a rigid schedule of training, eating and Aiden. Sleeping is out of the picture most nights because I get this nightmares about my dad dying and some other terrible stuff. One night about a week ago, Aiden fell asleep in my room and I didn't get any nightmares, he makes me feel so safe. I just had to ruin it all up as always. Maybe I'm just not meant to be loved by others? I'm just gonna assume so and keep walking towards my room to sleep. Yeah, I'm going to go to sleep and cuddle up alone in that stupid mattress that Takeda calls beds. He says that a true ninja does not care sleeping on the floor, that we should be thankful for our nice little beds. Yeah, our 'beds' are practically as thick a pillow, and not a very expensive one.

I open the door to my room and the lights are on. What? If it's not me, it's usually Aiden but he's mad at me. Guess I won't be sleeping anytime soon until I figure out who broke into my ro-

"Amanda!" Ava cuts my thoughts as she comes out of the bathroom. That's unexpected, what she doing here?

"Ava! How did you..." I point at the door behind me.

"Yeah I didn't break in, though that would have been pretty badass, I have a key." She answers.

"But the only person that has a copy is-"

"I know that's why I'm here, he gave it to me." She tells me cutting me off once again.

Why would Aiden send Ava to my room? "Why didn't he come himself?"

"He's busy."

"Busy, huh? I imagined 'cause you guys didn't come to training today and let me warn you, Takeda is furious."

"Yeah, we knew he would be anyway." She shrugs her shoulders. "But to the point, you girl have to change from that-" She points at my sports clothes "to that." She points at a gift box on top of my bed.

I haven't seen that before, she's must have brought it here. "What's that?" I ask.

"See for yourself." She replies.

I move past her and lift the box from it's spot. I hesitate for a few seconds but then open it to find the last thing I would have thought of. Underwear, laced underwear. "Care to explain?" I ask as I take out a black laced bralette from the box.

She gives me an innocent look and says "I'm not supposed to tell, but he searched for the only boutique in this god damn island and bought the most expensive underwear they had. If I were you I would put that on but right after taking a shower." She pinches her nose. "You kinda stinky" She smirks.

What's going on? I search through the box and find a little card saying 'A little gift for my one and only -Aiden'. Wait, he's not mad? Why is he giving me this things? Is he planning to, wait, are we going to...no it can't be, he's angry with me. He must be taking me out on a date, yeah this is only a date. But why is he giving you fancy underwear? He's never done that before, I tell myself. Oh my god, I know I wanted this but I'm still a girl and I'm allowed to get nervous. I just want to look perfect and be perfect for him, another one of his effects.

"Hey Amanda!" Ava takes me back to reality. "Shower?" She points to the bathroom.

"Oh yeah, I'm going." I answer as I put the gift down.

I walk into the bathroom, close the door and look at myself in the mirror. I don't know how I got so lucky to have an amazing guy like Aiden, but I know one thing for sure, he's the one.

* * *

Aiden's POV

I'm so nervous, it feels as if it was my first time. I've been working in this surprise all afternoon, I just want everything to be perfect. A little while ago I was jogging deep in the forest and I found this isolated old cabin in the middle of it. And since the rooms back in the training center are so not private, I decided to make it here. I've been cleaning, decorating, refreshing this place on my own. At least this cabin has a double bed unlike those 'mattresses' we have back in the rooms. Ava also helped me with the shopping and getting Amanda here. She should have gotten here by now and I'm starting to get worried that she'll never come. Maybe she's mad at me from yesterday, I mean I practically ran off after she told me she wanted to have sex with me. I'm in a fancy white shirt and some very nice pair of jeans just for her and she ain't showing up. I even made brownies and poured two glasses of wine. What if she doesn't come? Is all of this going to be a waste? I thought she was ready. Maybe I'm pushing her too fast or maybe she regretted sleeping with me. No, that's not like her, she wouldn't do that. Would she?

Then I hear it, finally, footsteps walking through the fallen leafs of the forest. I run to the window and see her. She looks gorgeous in her short and loose little white dress. Okay this is it, you can do this. I move to the front door and open it without waiting for her to knock.

She sees me, smiles shyly and says "I followed the path of red roses."

I can't help but smile. She looks so cute, so vulnerable. "Come in." I say.

She smiles, walks up the stairs of the cabin and enters.

I close the door behind her as I hear her talk. "Oh my god, Aiden, this is...amazing."

"You deserve it." I step behind her and rub her arms.

She leans into my touch and says "I don't."

That stops me. I let go of her and gently turn her around. "You do."

"I was awful with you last night. I didn't mean to say that, but I don't know why I did. I'm just such a jerk with everyone and even when I don't want to, it's true. I don't deserve this, I don't deserve any of this, I don't deserve you-"

"Stop right there." I cut her off. "You are a good person who has gone through so much and for that you deserve the world, you really do." I place my hand in her cheek.

She places her hand on top if mine and says "I meant the other things I said though."

I grab her by the hand and pull her to the table. It's old and little so I took care of that with a nice white tablecloth.

I open the chair for her. "Ladies first" She chuckles and sits down. I go into the kitchen, take out the brownies I cooked from the oven and put on the table.

"You cook?" She asks amazed.

"Well," I answer as I take out a bottle of red wine. "I wouldn't call it cooking, but I do my best."

I pour two glasses of wine and hand her one. Then I hand her a piece of brownie and take one myself. I sit down facing her.

She smirks and says "Alright Aiden Mathis, let's see how well you're at the kitchen." Then she takes a bite.

This is the part where all women test their men, if they can cook. Please like it, please like it.

I notice her furrowing her brows and I get immediately worried. Oh my god, this woman has this weird effects on me. Like this one right now, I can't stop worrying that something might not be perfect. Maybe I just need to relax, but this effects won't let me.

Then her face changes and she laughs. "The look on your face is priceless! Relax, I loved it. You definitely have the skills to be a baker."

I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. "Maybe we should give this all up and live out of a bakery."

That would be nice, to have a life with Amanda. It would be a dream come true. But we both know those are just dreams, we're here to revenge our families not to live a happy life.

She grabs my hand across the table bringing me back to the moment. "That sounds amazing, a future with you sounds amazing." She smiles at me sweetly.

I stare at her wondering if she really means that, if she truly wants a future with me. "Go ahead, eat it." I say.

And so she turns to her piece of brownie and I turn to mine. The light from the candles make her look stunning, she's so pretty.

After a few minutes of eating and drinking our wines in peace, she speaks again. "Aiden, can I tell you something?" I nod and she continues. "All my life I've felt- I've felt so...lonely, and the day I met you it all changed." She giggles softly. "I'm sorry, you know I'm not good at this. Now the world feels less of a nightmare, with you, it's as if there could actually be some happiness left in me. Aiden, I would put my life in your hands." She grabs my hands with hers.

I squeeze her hands, stand up making her stand with me, and bring her close to me. "And I would put mine in yours." I say as I cup her face and the lean in.

She kisses me softly and passionately at first, but then the kiss gets more heated. I rub my hand up and down her back as she wraps her arms around my neck. I let go of her lips and start kissing down her neck softly. She let's out a sigh and says "I'm ready, Aiden, take me to bed."

* * *

Emily/Amanda's POV

He stops everything he's doing and looks at me in the eyes after I say that. "You sure?"

I nod and smile shyly at him. I can't help but be nervous. I might not be a girly girl, but it is my first time after all.

"Come with me." He offers me to take his hand. I take it and he leads us towards a door near the living area. "Close your eyes." I do as I'm told. I hear him opening the door and we step in. He lets go of my hand but I don't move. "Okay now open them."

I hear his voice whisper in my ear from behind.

A gasp come out of me as I take a look around. There's candles making a trail towards the bed and around it too. The bedspread is red and there's a white rose lying on top of it. There's white Christmas lights hanging from the wall behind the bed. Everything looks so carefully done.

"Aiden, this is beautiful." I say.

"No, you're beautiful this is just an attempt." I blush at his remark. He steps towards and puts her hand on my waist. "Amanda, I want you to know that if you feel like stopping, anytime, you tell me. If you're uncomfortable or you don't longer want to do this you have to tell me. I don't want to force you to-"

I stop him by pressing my lips against him. "You're not forcing me to do anything, I want to." I say after we break the kiss.

He smiles and wraps his arms around me. I take a look at him, then at his shirt and then back at him as if asking for permission. He replies undoing his shirt himself and it's gone in seconds. I put my hands on his bare skin and kiss him. He kisses me back, passionately and steady, and I slip my tongue inside his mouth. His hands go to my thighs and slowly slip under my dress. When we break the kiss to take a breath, he slowly takes the end of my dress and starts pulling upwards as if asking for permission. I nod happy that all this cloth that's separating us is finally getting out of the way.

Once my dress is on the floor, he stares at me in my new lace underwear as if there's nothing else in the world. I just love everything he does to me, I love the way he touches me, and looks at me, and kisses me. "You are so beautiful." He says.

I blush at first, but then this sense of courage goes through me and I throw myself in his embrace, kissing him as if there's no tomorrow. He grabs my legs and makes me wrap them around his waist. Then he takes a few steps towards the bed caring me along and carefully places my back against it. I lay there as he quickly takes of his jeans and throws them across the room. He looks even sexier with those black boxers he's wearing as he hovers over me. He lowers his head and starts placing little kisses from the back of my ear to my neck and then down my collarbone. I grab a hold of his back as he goes further south, he's now right above my bra. But he stops, looks at me in the eye and asks "May I?"

Always a gentleman and I love that about him. I arc my back upwards and take it off myself. He takes that as a yes and continues his job. He kisses and bites one of my breasts as his hand gently massages the other.

I loose all control and sense, I'm loving the way his mouth feels on my skin. I've never felt like this before, so good, so safe, so loved.

Aiden's POV

I trail her flat stomach with kisses as I move south. Her muscles tense with my touch. She's so good, I love the salty taste of her body. But I stop once I reach the top of her underwear. I lower my cock on top of her and start rubbing it against her slowly. We're both still wearing our lower underwear but I like to tease her like this.

A moan scapes from her mouth and then she says "Aiden, please."

I softly smile, I'm loving the effect I have on her. I cling to the only cloth left on her body and take it out of the way. But I stop for a minute to look at her gorgeous body. Her stomach is toned, her muscles strong, her skin soft and her face, her face right now is priceless. I snap out of my little staring moment and continue taking my boxers off.

"Aiden, touch me" Amanda says in a husky voice.

"With pleasure my love." I answer as I bring my hand between her legs. I rub that part to get her a little more comfortable with me touching her. Another moan comes out of her mouth and that makes me want more. I slip two fingers inside of her and her moans become louder. Her nails cling into my skin as I push deeper inside of her.

"Oh Aiden, it feels so good!"

Once I finish my work down there, I move to her mouth again and kiss her softly and passionately. She kisses me back immediately and bites my lower lip as we part to breathe. Chills and desire rush through me as my naked body touches hers.

She looks at me in the eyes before saying "Aiden, you're the one I want, you are the one."

I love the way she's looking at me, with so much caring. "You're mine too, my one and only."

"Aiden, I want you, I need you." She whispers.

I get what she's referring to, this is it, she's ready. I'm nervous too, this is my first time with her but I'm not going to deny that I've been wanting to do this this for a while now.

I stare at her deep beautiful brown eyes for a few seconds and then answer "You're my one and only, Amanda, and you always will be."

**Soo it took me a while to finish this but I hope you liked it. Next chapter will continue right after chapter.**


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